Hitman |n.h|

55

This Chapter is dedicated to the wonderful @DesireHurts who is ever so sweet and supportive of me and this book :) Lots of love babes ! xx

****

2 Years Later

"I need more,doctor," I say in desperation.

He frowns and sighs.

"Amber,I've given you your needed dose.No more than that,"

I close my eyes and breathe heavily through my nose.

There are bags under my eyes and I have not slept in days,my body feels drained and weak.

"My anxiety is too much,Robert-" I say seriously and he closes the door.

"Amber,I really feel that you dont need extra doses.Just take the prescribed amount and relax." He says softly.

"I.Cant.Sleep." I whisper angrily.

"Amber,"

"I'm telling you that I need more dosages.I cant breathe half the time,Robert." I growl.

"Maybe extra stress is causing the excess anxiety,Amber.Working at the office,Collin and school-"

"-DONT.Do not bring my personal life into this,"

"This is all about your personal life,Ms.Havens.Now trust me as your doctor,"

He pauses and sighs,sitting next to me.

"Trust me as your friend,"

I look at him and try to even my breaths.

He looks at me sadly and looks towards his lap,at his board.

"Robert,everytime I close my eyes,I see him or Harry,or that car in flames-I can't sleep for a minute without having a panic attack," I sob.

He gently places his hand on my shoulder.

He stands then and shuffles to the other side of the room.

He grabs his pen and scribbles before speaking firmly.

"New dosage should be taken at 2 pills for the night.1 pill for the morning."

He opens the door and leaves,leaving me alone.

-

"I'm so sorry,I'm so sorry,and I mean it this time-I'm sorry for treating you like I did and I'm sorry for not telling you that I loved you enough for you to feel it.Im so sorry.But I love you more than any other person I've ever known.You need to stay with me,you keep me safe,you keep me grounded,Amber,don't leave me."

I scream loudly,gripping at my hair,sitting up quickly from my position in bed,my chest heaving.

I sob into my hands,and James sits up,holding me into his chest.

I fight for him to not touch me,but he still holds me close,soothing me with quiet whispers of "its okay" and "You're okay".

I couldn't fight the urge,and I stayed up for the rest of the night.

-

"Collin James,what on earth?!" I ask as Collin walks into the kitchen with mix matched clothes.

"This is my style,mom."

I laugh.

"Collin,you have to change.Im not sure if I like that for school,"

"Mom,please! This is me!"