Inkeri

Broken

**** Authors note - there are mentions of physical and mental abuse, please use discretion when reading****

Laying in her bed sweating, panicked, and heart-beating fast she is paralyzed from fear. Standing there at the end of her bed, a towering shadow awaits. She sees the shadow move and she screams, waking her self up from the nightmare. Her father hears her blood-curdling scream and runs to her bedroom. "What's wrong?" her father says as he barges into the room. Hugging her blanket close and in tears, she has lost every bit of composure she had left. Her father attempts to embrace her in a hug around the shoulders to console her but she scurries away. It takes her a few seconds to recognize it is her father and she practically jumps into his arms. His heart breaking as he watched her in those few seconds waiting for his daughter to realize it was him, it felt like it was an eternity. He wishes he did not have to see his daughter go through all this pain. Wishing he could take it all away, he sits there with his daughter as she curls up into him crying uncontrollably. He sits there in silence, not knowing what to say or do other than to rub her back and be there for her.

In her father's loving embrace, she feels calmer and comforted. So much has happened in the last two weeks and she can barely contain all of her emotions. How is she ever going to be ok? Her father starts singing to her in a soft crooning voice. She starts to yawn and slip into sleep. Her mother appears in the doorway as her father lays her down, gently tucking her in bed. They both give a concerned look to each other.

It is four in the morning and they are both weary. They decided to discuss how they could possibly help her, both making their way to the living room. Her relationships had broken her. The times they have seen her cry over Chad and Jeremy have taken a toll on them and her. She met Chad in sixth grade, brand new to the school, he was the first one to make her feel welcome. Immediately and almost unpredictably, she started to call him "my boyfriend." At the time, they just thought it was innocent and "young love." Little did they know, it would turn toxic as soon as the two entered high school. She had started to bloom into a young lady with curves and everyone would pick on her for being the heavier girl. "Remember when she came home crying the first day of high school?" her father remembers. "She stopped eating and tried to lose weight." They immediately started to get her therapy to try to help her.

It was then they started to notice Chad treating her differently. He would point out different girls and asking why she could not be "like them." There were many nights she would come home crying and hiding in her room. "Honey, do you remember when Chad told her, she could not leave him because without him, she'd be nothing." Her mother cringes remembering that night well. They had tried to tell her to leave him and stop her from seeing him but, as young children do, she did not listen to them. High school was torture for them, watching their girl spiral swiftly down a dark path they could not stop her from running. Vacations away from Chad were the only time they saw their little girl smile anymore during those years of solitude. She finally left the relationship in the last quarter of her senior year. It wasn't until her first year of college that a little spark of light came back to their beautiful blossoming young woman.

Oh, how they felt relief for their girl, she was coming out of her shell. She loved her courses and pursuing her love of learning. She was maintaining a 3.9 GPA and had a part-time job working in a furniture store. "Remember when we went to look for a new bedroom set?" her mother recalls. "She was so enthusiastic she could have sold us the entire store with the amount of passion she had when describing the bedding we purchased." It was here she met Jeremy, the new boy in town and another part-time employee. He was so nice at the time. He took her parents out to dinner and she had told them she was so happy with him. She maintained her grades and kept the part-time job. In her junior year of college, Jeremy and her had decided to move in together. "We gave her our blessing, not knowing how it would turn out."

Shortly thereafter, they noticed a similar pattern starting to show. Jeremy was right by her side, not allowing her to speak to others or even look at other people. Friends, co-workers, classmates, even her parents were not allowed to be talked to without his "accepting look." They heard less and less of her each week and started to worry once again. Her father recalls the first time he saw a bruise on her. He questioned her and she dismissed it as falling down. He doubted her at the time but due to her known clumsiness, he did not push her further for fear of her "snapping" at him. Her parents had noticed her short temper every time they brought up anything about her relationship with Jeremy. The whole town knew about his abusive tendencies because of the bruises she carried around. Looking like an abused dog, she would walk around with her hands folded in front of her and her face always looking down. Her parents begged and beseeched her to leave him. "For weeks on end, she would not talk to us" her mother started crying. It had been torture, not knowing if their little girl had been hurt or, even worse, killed. She had tried leaving him once before but he threatened to commit suicide and "she did not want that on her conscious." She immediately went back to him that night leaving her parents stunned. The beating she received that night would land her in the hospital. "Four nights we sat there crying, watching her, pleading for her to make it through" her mother recalled wincing at the memories they were both looking back on. Pale and bruised, when she finally opened her eyes, she refused to press charges or give a statement and since there were no witnesses, there was little the police could do. Oh, the pain showing on both their faces remembering the events could make any parent cry.

Jeremy had told her he had changed and he would never do it again. "A lie, both of us tried to tell her" but she was always head-strong and said he had changed. Reluctantly, they could not do anything to stop her. She was of legal age to be with him. Her mother recalled, "I felt so helpless. There was nothing we could say to her." Sighing, her father shook his head, tears starting to form in his eyes from all the times he felt he should and could have protected his daughter. "Oh, honey, there is nothing we can do about the past, we can only help her now." They sat there, in silence, crying, neither of them daring to look at each other or say anything more.

She would find them, in each other's arms, tear stained faces but smiling at her. Trying to change the atmosphere, they ask if she is hungry. "No, not right now" she states, shocked her parents look so old and weary right now. She knows what they were discussing, not even asking. She recalls her nightmare and knows they have been up all night. How many times had they done this over the last years, all the times she dismissed their feelings because she thought she was in love. How would they ever forgive her? She started crying and collapses into their arms. She felt so small, she had hurt them so many times when she was in pain herself. Her father holds her close, kissing the top of her head. Her mother holding her hand and talking softly. Her mother's words are inaudible. Time passes, no one speaking, all embraced in a family hug. Her father knows they will get through this, but first, they need to file for a restraining order. The unconditional love she feels in their arms is almost too much for her to handle. The grandfather clock chimes eight times, breaking the silence. Her father states matter-of-factly, "we might want to consider eating something before we start legal proceedings this early in the morning." Shocked, his daughter stares up at him intensely, she conceded and started looking up online how to file for one. Her mother started making breakfast and her father was shopping online for security equipment.