A Good Thing

-goodbyes-

Chapter 49

-goodbyes-

He shouldn't have waited until the day before she was leaving to have this revelation. Should he tell her how he felt or would that only distract her when she needed to be focused? Maybe that was giving himself too much credit.

Migs made his way to Asta's apartment. Cara was with Paz in their apartment and he did not want to hang around to hear that goodbye sex. That wasn't what he wanted from Asta. He just needed to tell her how he felt, to spend time with her before she left.

But he wouldn't complain if his night ended in any amount of Asta's skin on his.

By the time he reached her door he still hadn't decided how to say what he needed her to know. Knocking anyway, his half formed musings slipped away completely when she opened the door. Her smile was bright and when her eyes took him in a blush colored her freckled cheeks.

"Migs! Hey." When he couldn't think of anything to say besides a muttered 'hey' she stood to the side and invited him in.

Cara's stuff was packed up and stacked to the side, her favored blaster laying across the top. Crates he recognized as Asta's were similarly arranged. A pang shot through him at the reminder that she was leaving. With a heavy sigh, Migs looked up at her ready to tell her why he'd come.

"Asta I..."

She didn't hear his muttered words and started talking rapidly.

"I'm glad you're here, Migs. I wanted to say goodbye before we leave tomorrow." To his battle weary mind she looked much too excited. "My Uncle says we could be gone a couple of months. We're going to my home world first, did you know that? I'm really looking forward to kicking some trooper ass after all these years. Pay them back for my family and take my home back. There hasn't really been any action out here besides sparring so I guess I'm looking forward to it. I'm really excited to see my home again, Migs."

He only flinched a little at her words. She didn't notice but eventually his pinched frown caught her attention.

"Migs, what's wrong?"

Trying to think of how to not offend her and finally deciding he didn't care, he shook his head. "Look, I get that this is an important fight for you but you shouldn't be so excited to go to war, Asta. It's not... it's not a game." She looked hurt and taken aback by his words and his tone but he carried on before she could interrupt. "Those troopers might be loyal to the Empire or they might not have had anywhere else to go but they've all got a lot more experience than you and they shoot back."

She was frowning at him now, clearly upset. "I know that but I..."

"Do you? Have you ever killed anyone before?"

Her exasperated sigh told him her answer well before her words could. "Well no but I'm a Mandalorian, it's what we do. It's not that hard."

Stunned at her dismissive attitude, Migs had to look away from her before he did something stupid. "Ya well, it shouldn't be. I know the white plate armor is pretty dehumanizing but there's still a warm body underneath."

He scrubbed a hand over his face and sighed again. To her, to most people, they were just faceless evil drones. And to be fair, a lot of them were. Kriff, he killed hundreds in one shot when he blew the mine back on Morak. That had been to stop further genocide, but that didn't mean it didn't sometimes keep him up at night. If his old commanding officer was there, who's to say some of his old squad mates hadn't been too?

Asta scoffed and crossed her arms. "You just don't understand because you're not one of us." That stung more than he'd thought it could. "Fighting, killing, battle, it's what Mandalorians do, it's who we are. I'm excited because I finally get to participate in that important part of my heritage and free my home. And besides, just because you were a stormtrooper and you got out, doesn't mean they're all secretly good people."