The boy in the dorm next door.

A world full of lies

"So you are the whole fucking reason my mums an alcoholic" I yelled, shoving him away and taking my shoes off.

"No, I never meant too-"

"You fucking ruined my life, you ruined her life. Get the fuck out." I shouted, tears started to form in my eyes.

"Please just let me explain-"

"I said get the fuck out now." I declared, pushing him further out the door.

I slammed the door shut, then locking it straight away.

I can't put up with his shit anymore.

I grabbed my black diary, and my pen.

Dear diary.

I haven't wrote in this diary for a long time, it's because I haven't had anything I needed to write. But now, everything's changed.
I moved away from my mom, and finally was feeling something good. Happiness.
But then I had to meet him. Saint. He told me that there's these two gangs...the blood reds and the storms? It still confuses me, I don't get why someone would want to form gangs.
My mother and father supposedly had something to do with the blood reds, apparently it's why my mother is addicted.
A lot of creepy shit has also happened, many guys tried to attack me but they ended up with a bullet through their head. I keep getting these signs... people are coming for me? They want me? But why?
I'm just an ordinary girl, what the fuck could they want from me?

I shut my diary, placing it back onto the desk. I sat in silence for a few moments, realising everything that had happened recently.

This week would be busy at my new job anyways, thankfully that would take my mind off things.

I had no assignments that needed to be handed in, so I had free time. I needed to relax anyways, I decided to freshen up after feeling rough.

I turned the shower on, making sure the water was hot. I grabbed some scrubs and hair products, then scrubbed the shit out of my body so I could smell good. As I washed myself, I noticed the scars drawn across my body.
I knew I had them, but I barley even bothered to look. I had small ones across my arms, a large one across my hip and a lot more on my legs.

So fucking weak.

Tears suddenly flowed down my cheeks, I realised how I let someone do all this damage to me.

So worthless.

I feel so worthless, so pathetic. How could I be so weak to let someone beat me, belittle me so much.

I stepped out, grabbing the grey fluffy towel to wrap around me. I stared at myself in the square mirror, looking at all my imperfections.

The way my nose looked from the side,
The way my eyes were a odd shape,
The way my face was slim,
The way I looked weak.

I never really cared about the little things like this, but it started to bother me.

Imagine how disgusted Saint would've been when he saw me, I bet he thought I was some young weakling who looked so fucking pathetic.

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door, I grabbed my towel tighter and rushed over.

"Hello?"

"Hey I know you don't want too-"

I shut the fucking door. No fucking way would I let him even have the audacity to come in, after everything.

My poor mother, she was addicted because of him. It was all his fault. 

"Please, sage. Let me explain in more detail." He whispered, it sounded like he was sitting against the other side of the door.