Gave myself a little challenge based off this prompt...just some harmless fun :)
"Your local store runs out of your favorite beverage. You will go to any length to obtain it..."
*******
"That can't be right. This has never happened before."
"m'fraid it is. We're all out till the next batch arrives."
I look over his shoulder. There sitting on a shelf, is exactly ONE can of koopa koola.
Koopa Kola. You ever heard of that brand? I mean, how can anybody NOT? It's only like, the best hard drink ever. Yes, that's right, it doesnt qualify to be a soft drink because it's so HARDCORE. I drink it everyday, like one with each meal. Then one to tide me over from breakfast to lunch...one during recess break on the days there's school...another for supper and a last one before bed. You get my drift.
The store clerk catches my darting eyes.
"Sorry pal but that's my can."
Your can? YOUR CAN? IT IS MINE, KOOPA KOLA AMBASSADOR. DRINKER OF KOOPAS. I seethe and rage and feel my skin begin to boil over.
"Okay." I shrug nonchalantly. "But before I go, can I look at the back of it? I want to know where these stuff are made. What with all the regulation violations these days, one can never be too careful."
"m'aight, but don't you be pulling any funny business or nothing, y'hear me?" He proceeds to lift the Koopa Kola off the shelf.
I nod. Of course I nod, who wouldn't at this point.
In slow motion, as we reach out over the counter, I watch as my free hand comes whipping around the side, aiming for the bottom of the can in the hopes of knocking it out of the unsuspecting fellow's grip.
"Whatdya doing?"
"I'm sorry?"
He points away from my out-stretched palm. I realize my other hand is moving in slow motion towards the can of Koopa Kola.
"um, nothing much...?"
DAMNNITTTT.
Quick as a whip, I complete the motion. The can pops cleanly out of his grasp and I snatch it out of the air with the same hand. In the same motion, I pull out a crisp two-dollar bill and smack it onto the counter.
"So long, sucker!" I make sure to drag the 'r' for dramatic effect as I make clean my get away.
The last thing I hear is a loud 'Hey!' before I burst out of the store, sunlight blinding me momentarily.
And then I trip over a curb.
My holy Koopa does an arc of St. Louis, transitions into a Grand Jete, lands, does a Brise and finally a Cote, de.
10/10, would drop again.
The can is on its side now, contents spilling out. Klaxons sound in my head as I watch my life juices leak out into the road gutter.
"Scottie. Beam me down." I half-mumble to myself.
Still on the floor, I scuttle/spider-crawl over to the side of the pavement at a speed that would have put most horror films to shame.
I stick my tongue out and close my eyes in bliss as I let the Koopa Kola ebb out of the can and down my throat.
SATISFYING.
A rumble of exhaust fills my airways as a vehicle door slams shut. Coughing a little, I turn and squint up at the one who dares disturb my Rekooparation.
AYYYY. I give myself a mental high-five.
As my eyes open, I take in the sight of a Koopa Kola delivery truck, the side doors are open and my eyes feast upon layers of stacked cartons, filled to the brim with delicious Koopa.
The delivery man stands there, clipboard in hand, looking down at me oddly. Just at the entrance of the convenience store, the clerk stands in the shadow of the doorway, also staring.
"Werr tuut erhh sehh lawhh?" I put my tongue back in my mouth, got back up and brushed myself off.
"About time you came."
