Jessica Grayson has struggled with body dysmorphia and bullying for most of her life. And when she believes she has finally turned things around for herself, she is betrayed and made fun of by her boyfriend and close friends, which sends her into a...
This chapter is dedicated to MrsJadeDicapriothank you soo much for all the love you've been giving my story. It always makes me happy to see your comments. Love you!
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He sits so still that for a moment, I wonder if he heard me. He stares at me unblinkingly and then shakes his head as if in denial.
"I've always wanted to live in Paris, and this seems like a good time to do it. I'm moving in with my cousin, Alex until I figure out the housing there. I can use the summer to get to know the campus and surroundings." I explain.
Liam shakes his head again, holding his head between his hands.
"Please tell me this is a joke, Jess. Please."
"I know this is sudden. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I applied there. I didn't actually think I would consider enrolling."
He takes a ragged breath and looks at me. The vulnerability and pain in his eyes is so stark it makes me wince.
"You're leaving me?"
"Liam,..."
"No, you promised, Jess. You promised you wouldn't give up. I told you I can't handle losing you." He gets up and walks over to me.
I take a startled breath when he takes my hand in his, sitting next to me.
"I know I deserve this. I do. You have every right to want to leave. But you can't, Jess. You can't end us. I will give you space if you want. We can take a break, and I won't bother you. Everything will be on your terms."
His hands are trembling in mine, and I grip them firmly.
"I'm sorry, Liam. But this can't go on. It has to end before we trap ourselves in a vicious cycle of causing each other so much pain. We can't keep depending on each other for our happiness. We both have past wounds that made us who we are, and we need to work on healing them. We need to be able to stand alone before we can stand together. "
He shakes his head again, his face contorted with confusion and anguish.
"You're actually breaking up with me?" He grimaces. "We love each other. I love you more than life itself. I would do anything for you, Jess. Anything."
"But I don't just want to be loved. I want to be trusted. I want to be respected. I need communication. I don't want to cry more than I laugh. I don't want to wake up wondering if I'm going to find out something that will crush me. You keep so much hidden, Liam. I am always trying to understand, but how can I when you're always hiding from yourself? I just can't do it anymore. It's too painful. I don't want to go through the same thing my mom went through. We both deserve better."
