100 Days with my Perfect Boyfriend

Ch. 2: Moving On

A convertible car is speeding through the highway. Sa sobrang bilis ng takbo nito, lumagpas na nga ito sa speed limit pero walang pakialam ang driver.

I stepped hard sa accelerator. I needed the speed to vent my frustration and anger at para kahit papaano to calm my shaking nerves and to soothe my aching heart.

Walang tigil pa rin ang pagpatak ng luha ko sa aking mga mata.

Damn. 'Di ko na alam kung kailan ito titigil.

Nakakabingi na rin ang katahimikan sa loob ng kotse so I turned on the radio at nilagay ko ang volume sa pinakamalakas.

If you ever leave me, baby

Leave some morphine at my door

Cause it would take a whole lot of medication

To realize what we used to have

We don't have it anymore.

Ano ba naman? Kung sinuswerte ka ba naman, pati ba naman yung radyo nakakarelate sa akin?

I sighed. But eventhough I hate to admit it, this song really reflected what I feel right now. It really tugged my breaking heart.

There's no religion that could save me

No matter how long my knees are on the floor, oh

So keep in mind all the sacrifices I'm making

To keep you by my side

And keep you from walking out the door.

And suddenly the image of Paolo and me came flashing back at me.

Sobrang saya namin noon. Paolo was the best I ever had. Many people say that we're the perfect couple. Paolo was no doubt, handsome. He's tall, with that smoldering eyes and his sexy yet cute smile. Paolo was romantic too. He liked to take me out for dates despite of his busy schedule. He would gave in to my whines and pouts. He would always protect me in any way he could. He was perfect.

Pero ito ang masakit doon--HE WAS. Past tense.

Cause there'll be no sunlight if I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies if I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds, my eyes will do the same

if you walk away

Everyday, it will rain, rain, rain

At kahit gaano siya ka-perfect. At kahit gaano kami ka-perfect, I should have known that there is no such thing as perfect sa mundo na ginagalawan natin.

I'll never be your mother's favorite ah

Your daddy can't even look me in the eye

Oooh if I were in their shoes, I'd be doing the same thing

Saying there goes my little girl walking with that troublesome guy

I shouldn't let him be my everything. I shouldn't see this would go on forever. But then again, sino ba naman ang pumapasok sa isang relationship na hindi gustong tumagal ito ng panghabangbuhay?

It's over. Pinauulit-ulit ko ito sa sarili ko.

But they're just afraid of something they can't understand

Oooh well little darling watch me change their minds

Yeah for you I'll try, I'll try, I'll try, I'll try

I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that'll make it right

Ilang breakups na ba ang naranasan ko. Marami na. At dapat ay sanay na ako. Dapat alam ko na ang gagawin ko. Pero sino ba naman ang gustong masanay na masaktan?

I shook my head to remove these thoughts but I can't control them. The confession of Paolo to me came playing back in my head.

Cause there'll be no sunlight if I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies if I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds, my eyes will do the same

if you walk away

Everyday, it will rain, rain, rain

Naglalakad kaming dalawa sa park. Maraming tao sa park because it was a weekend. It was romantic because it was already night time and the lights were shining on us.

"ATTENTION EVERYONE!!!"

Nagulat ako ng biglang umakyat si Paolo sa isang bench at sumigaw. Halos lahat ng tao sa park ay napatigil at tumingin sa kanya.

"Hindi po ako sira ulo..." he started.

Many people chuckled at his remark. I smiled.

"...but I'm going crazy over this one girl."

Tumingin siya ng diretso sa aking mga mata and suddenly I started to blush madly. The crowd shifted their attention to me.

"Maganda siya, matalino, mabait, magalang, kapag tumatawa siya nawawala ang mga problema ko, kapag napapasaya ko siya'y sumasaya na din ako, lahat na ata nasa kanya and I could go on and on forever just talking about her."

The crowd cooed and cheered.

"Gusto ko lang sabihin sa harap ng lahat ng taong nandito, that I, Juan Paolo Gomez, love you so much, Eunice Bianca Alcantara...

...I love you so much, Eubi."

Ooooh Don't just say goodbye, don't just say, goodbye

I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that'll make it right

Cause there'll be no sunlight if I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies if I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds, my eyes will do the same

if you walk away

Everyday, it will rain, rain, rain

I maneuvered my car to the side of the road and hit on the brake hanggang tumigil ang kotse.

I pulled the hand brake. 

I sat up and saw my reflection in the rear view mirror. My eyes were really red and swollen. My mascara was all smudged.

I really looked like a mess.

A total wrecked mess.

Then, I rested my forehead against the steering wheel.

And soon tears rolled down my eyes, again.

"I love you too," I mumbled.

I hate you Paolo...

But I hate myself even more....

....for loving you so much.