Angevil's Portrait of Portals

Chapter 5. Endless Tears

Everything inside the village was destroyed by the fire. A number of our men who managed to lessen the degree of fire got killed because of it. The survivors took shelter in the barn next to the rice fields while waiting for rescue. We sat down on a pile of hay in the stable of horses and cows. Everyone was sobbing as they mourned for the deaths of their loved ones including me. It seemed like there were endless tears and it's the end of everything for us. Hours have past but the fire was still ongoing. The male villagers were tackling the fire alongside a group of city men who had just arrived in the village. Due to hunger and fatigue, most of the villagers stayed silent while some begged to enter the village in search of their deceased loved ones. Bisig's mother slowly approached grandma and asked in a weak tone of voice, "What are we going to do now? Please answer me." She asked with tears and hatred in her eyes. Grandma who seemed to have spaced out for quite some time, gazed at her blankly and replied, "I couldn't bring back the lives of those whom we have lost. No words could express how- how sorry I am. I beg of you to pray. Please pray. That is all I can do." Bisig's mom looked dismayed. She was trying to control her emotions as she spoke the words, "Please leave tomorrow and never come back. It's clear that any sort of connection with you brings harm to our people. I am sorry for your loss. But my people's safety is my number one priority." Grandma looked down the ground speechless then she embraced me from my right shoulder trying to comfort me knowing that I overheard their conversation. It touched my heart knowing that despite everything I have done wrong, my grandma still never blamed me nor despised me and still she believed in me. She was always on my side to protect me no matter what. She whispered in my ear that there will come a time when everything will be fine so I needed to stay strong. One of the elderly women spoke as Bisig's mom walked away from us. "All of us have lost a loved one. Some don't even have anyone by their side anymore so please don't be like this. Do not spread hate at a time when we need each other the most. Do not worry, Help is on the way. We all need each other at this very moment." After hearing the old woman, Bisig's mom then continued to walk out of the barn while her son followed him. Grandma wiped her tears and looked at me then she said, "Your father, a brave man that he always were, came back to the village only to say goodbye to us. He said he left you a letter saying that he knew you would look for him and your mom. He knows you well, Diwa. You got that fire burning in you which came from your late father, Asterio." Grandma smiled then she added, "It should have been the most wonderful memory of us being together if only you were here before we lost them. We would have been complete even just for that moment. But.. Asterio said that he had predicted those Spaniards would burn down the village. So you, Diwa, not being here during that time was not out of pure luck but was merely a destiny." She said as she stroked my hair downwards, but tears started running down her cheeks again. "Lola, what happened to mom and dad?" I stuttered. I wanted to hear something positive from my grandma because I know how high-spirited she was as a person, but deep down I already know the truth. Grandma couldn't make eye contact with me. She held both of my hands and kept her eyes closed while saying, "After your father bid his final farewell to us.." She wasn't able to continue. "Lola?" It was all I can speak of at that very moment. My chest felt so heavy as I anticipated the following words to be said by grandma. She opened her eyes as she wept and I can see how hard she tried not to cry infront of me. She wiped her tears as she took a deep breath then she faced me and said, "Your father said goodbye but as he was leaving the gates, the Spaniards.. they shot him..and your mom..and most of the villagers before burning the entire village down. We, the remaining survivors got out through the woods." I couldn't believe it. My eyes widened from anger as I shouted, "No!" Countless times. I cried out loud even when tears have already dried out from my eyes afters hours of crying. My heart was in so much pain that I ran out of the barn into the woods as quickly as I could. I ran until I lost most of my energy and lay down on the ground surrounded by trees. I spoke to myself cursing aloud over and over again. I saw the flames from afar and promised myself that the next time I get to see such flames is when I can finally put down the one who caused it.
"Diwa." Bisig stood infront of me and offered me his hand. With his help I got up and replied, "I will find a way to end this. I promise. For everyone including you and my family, I will get revenge." Bisig argued and said, "That's enough, Diwa. There is nothing we can do. Let us leave our late loved ones at peace." Then he grabbed both of my shoulders and said, "Let God do the rest. In him we will find justice. All we can do now is rebuild what's left of us and make use of all the remaining resources that we have. By then we can start living normal lives again." I pushed his hands away from me and debated, "How are we going to live normal lives when those Spaniards can come any moment and kill us? Is that what you call living a normal life? More like living in fear maybe." Bisig tried to calm himself down before saying, "Who's going to stop them then? You? The church? The church is the only government existing in false pretense making it's people suffer more and more. Tell me, What are you planning to do now?" I couldn't think of anything to answer. I got carried away by my emotions and thought of going back to town and killing atleast the priest or any of the Spaniards I could find. I wanted to cry again, but my tears have already dried up. Bisig offered his hand again as a gesture of going back to the village. Like mine, I saw how sad his eyes were. We then walked silently back to the village.
"Bisig!" A voice called out to him and grabbed his arm away from me. It was his mom. She advised me by saying, "You better start acting like a grownup. We only have ourselves to survive in this chaos. Everyone needs to stay near the village until we regain our strength so we can all start a brand new life again." I just stood there as they walked away then I saw grandma approach me in a worried state and asked, "Diwa, are you alright? I am so sorry." She then embraced me tightly. I answered, "Lola, I should be the one to say sorry. I am deeply sorry." I cried. In a distance I saw Isla, my cousin weeping and with that I wanted to comfort her. Just as I was about to move towards her, Bisig approached her and hugged her.
Soon we all heard unfamiliar voices approaching the village and two men were riding two separate horses. There were also five carriages coming near the barn. I couldn't identify which city they came from but for sure they were here to offer us some help. A rider from one of the horses was from our village. He sought help from his old friends from another city. The other male rider was his bestfriend named, 'Destino' and they offered to help us in any way that they could. The five carriages carried mostly food and supplies for us. The villagers were offered shelter back in the city but the majority remained to put out the fire and some waited until only the ashes could be seen so they could enter the village again. I was about to walk slowly towards the bits of fire to see for myself what was left in the village and to atleast see my parents, when grandma gently grabbed my arm. I looked back at her and I stopped. The people from the city introduced themselves and gave us each a bag of food, some clothes and supplies. We were all grateful to them. We then waited until the fire went away. After some time, the city people and the male villagers entered the burnt village. Grandma and I stayed at the barn with mostly women and children. We waited anxiously for news of any survivors within the village. All of us huddled together as we heard a faint cry coming from the inner fences of the village. Grandma put her hands onto my ears so I couldn't hear the screams of the people there. I was so hard headed and curious that I hurriedly ran outside and went directly to the village gates. I slowly walked inside and saw that everything was burnt. There were still some bits of fire and tons of ashes left. I walked further and further until I saw that infront of me was my dead father. I felt my knees got weak as I knelt down the ground and cried heavily. I called out to my father several times and tried to hold him tight but a young male at his teen years pulled me away from my father. Out of anger, I slapped him hard on the face and shouted at him, "Let me go!" At that moment, I didn't care who he was or if he was just trying to help me. He was actually trying to protect me from getting burnt myself. I stood there crying as I recognized my mother just a few inches away from where my father lies. There were tons of bodies lying next to each other on the ground. My feet began to feel heavy as I crawled my way towards my mother. From outside the gates stood grandma helplessly crying. I didn't look back at her but I was able to recognize her voice. The young man beside me looked away as I caressed my mother and embraced her. I felt the heat of the fire on my mom's body. Deep within, the pain of losing my parents hurt more than the fire pricking on my bare skin. The male villagers who have already searched the whole village came back to the gates as they wept while carrying their dead loved ones and putting them beside each other on the ground. The women and the children from the barn came to see us. I felt so exhausted that I didn't even notice I was slowly closing my eyes and soon I lost consciousness on my mother's arms. The loud cries and echoes were slowly fading away and everything around me turned pitch black. I will never forget this day. Today, I wasn't able to see the beauty of the sunset at all.