glow - trixya

chapter 5: burning

2021

At some point, Katya quits drinking. That point is exactly when the first John Mayer song starts playing. There sure are a lot of things she is legally obligated to do, but enduring the wave of 2000's love songs the DJ has thought to be a good idea is not one of them.

Thankfully, Trixie had gotten the message and didn't come after her at the bar, which gave Katya the freedom to wander around the hotel when she decided it was time to stop abusing the sparkling wine, but she took the leftover bottle with her just in case. Between stumbling on steps she hadn't seen at first and knocking a few flower pots over, what makes her curse all the alcohol she's been drinking is the natural disaster of thoughts going on inside of her head. In fact, it almost makes her giggle as she walks around the hotel aimlessly.

The first few months after the whole deal with Trixie happened back in that school trip for their Biology class were the heaviest. Katya never truly understood if she was thankful or sorry for the fact that it happened so close to their graduation. It did save her the embarrassment and sorrow of having to see Trixie every day for another year knowing that they were both to blame for what happened between them, knowing that she came so close to having the best thing she's ever been a part of back but failed miserably, knowing that Trixie wouldn't be willing to listen to anything she had to say. At the same time, it took away all of the answers she could have had - especially the one about how many times a person gets to be forgiven, since she had wasted two of her chances pretty much on the same day.

College made it easier. She met new people, found new interests, and finally discovered that she wasn't as dumb as everyone made her out to be. Unfortunately, some things are never fully digested, and the thought of Trixie had always lingered in the back of her mind. It came out of the darkness from time to time to remind her that hell is full of good intentions, including her own. She thought about calling, but she didn't have any numbers. She stalked Trixie's profile on Facebook, but never sent a friend request. She drove by Trixie's parents' house when visiting her dad during Christmas once, but decided not to knock. Many chances given, none taken. That had always been the worst of Katya's habits.

And then look where she ended up: drunk at her high school enemy's wedding, lost in a fancy hotel. Out of all the scenarios she had made up in her mind before falling asleep for all these years, this was definitely not one of them. A part of her keeps tugging at the words "meant to be", but the rest of her has been trying to drown that part in the bitter bubbles she's been drinking. Still, she knows deep in her core that she's in the right place, in the right time. Fuck, anywhere Trixie might be is the right place and the right time. Anything is can get from her at this point is good enough, even if it ends up not being the closure she's been expecting. Perhaps all she needs to do now is wait until the bride is drunk enough herself to come talk to Katya. Well, actually, first she needs to fix the fake eyelash that's been bugging her for the past few minutes.

Absentmindedly, she makes her way to where she believes the restroom is supposed to be. Katya furrows her brow and scrunches her nose. The last time she came here there weren't these many plants around, and the door was different as well. Man, what even is tequila close to the sparkling wine they serve here , she thinks, hand reaching towards the copper doorknob that probably costs more than her apartment alone. The first thing she feels is a cool breeze passing by her, touching her hair ever so slightly. Thank fuck she chose to keep the blazer on, though that was mostly to avoid any accidents involving exposed boobs. She loves the jumpsuit she has on, but she doesn't trust it completely since it has, in fact, failed her before. The memory makes her cringe. Around her, a garden emerges as she steps out the door, and she's guessing that guests are probably not supposed to be here. Through the walls, and at this point only god knows how many walls there are between her and the party, she hears Mariah fucking Carey booming out the speakers. It steals a grunt from her. She could turn around and go back, but... Well, she's already here anyway.