Only A Memory [Kaneki Ken] | ✓

2 Days [Regret]

Kaneki stared down at the pitiful stone slab that had been placed on the ground, near the back of the cemetery. The spider-lilies he left almost two weeks ago, were wilted and only sad excuses of dried stems remained. This scene was depressing- yet all to familiar to him.

On the headstone "Y/N LN" was written in small letters.

Nothing more, nor nothing less.

Y/N had no family in Japan, and it had only been a month since the incident.

It had only been a month ago since Kaneki also stopped taking his prescribe medicine.

It had only been a month and only he knew of her death. Of course her colleagues at college must've noticed her disappearance, and her co-workers too surely would have been worrisome to see that she missed 4 weeks of her work shifts. Yes, her apartment had been checked but it was completely empty.

Her belongings were gone, and their were no traces of the girl any longer.

That's right, he had only known her for two months- though the endeavor felt like years.

Kaneki had moved everything to an isolated area that he was sure wouldn't be discovered- he even kept some things for himself.

Like the wind, she had picked up and left and no one was surprised. The girl was just a small piece of all of their lives, even though they made up her whole world.

But Kaneki wasn't at all surprised- because this is what she did to her family in America. She grew up poorly but still managed to keep bright ambitions intact. So of course, when she received a full scholarship that included studying abroad she jumped at the chance to leave her dejected life behind.

How did Kaneki know this?

She told him so herself, when they went on a date.

A date that seemed like it was ages ago. A date that would possibly be one of his only good memories of the girl.

This is why no one was shocked -or elated- when she up and left without a word's notice. No one in her family cared after she abandoned them so easily, and her friends weren't close enough to bother and take action.

And no remains were found- if Kaneki allowed for that to happen, of course others would be frantic.

His fists were clenching at his sides and instead of tears flowing, rage began to feel him up. His left eye was burning at the image of her engraved into the back of his mind.

Once, he was able to hold her without the fear that she would leave at anytime. Though he knew her intentions for him were quite different from his own, he allowed for her to have fun. Y/N was a bit to carefree and loose with her life for his liking but every other quality Y/N possessed, he was infatuated with.

Her habit to hum while reading a book due in class, or even just a plain textbook could still be heard in his ears.

Her ability to talk to others so easy -something he had yet to master- and make friends after just meeting them, was something of hers that he was in love with.

Y/N was a bit quick-witted, but still maintained a soft heart even though her previous life should've shaped her to be a person that was cold and stoic. She defied all odds and he managed to end her before she was able to shine her brightest.

It was hard for him to believe that jealousy was the one character of his, that she would always remember him by.

Kaneki was never one to share what he thought was his but then again, he couldn't isolated Y/N from the rest of the world. But she didn't wish to be tied down to a single lover- not just yet, at least.

He couldn't stand her passion of being defiant, almost as much as he couldn't stand that fact that Y/N had nearly no trust in him.

By now the cemetery was a few glances behind Kaneki has he kept his gaze forward. His hand fumbled in the pocket of his jeans until he grasped the familiarity of a simple hairpin that once belonged to an extraordinary girl.

The crimson spider-lilies that once occupied his hand now decorated the girl's grave, again. It was something he did for her -almost like an endless goodbye- every two weeks.

It was ironic- a grave that didn't hold a body of any sort.

The darkness that coated his insides, and every inch of his heart was arising again. His throat felt as if it was swelling up and the air became thinner, sharper and overall harder to inhale in. It was something he tried to suppress, but never had succeeded in doing. His goal was to not hurt anyone if it wasn't necessary and he had failed when it came to the person that mattered most.

It seeping through his mind again, and he couldn't handle the outbreak that was bound come- all he felt was,

regret.