14. || the vision

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So crazy doesn't even sum up my life anymore and to be completely honest I don't think things can get any worse

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So crazy doesn't even sum up my life anymore and to be completely honest I don't think things can get any worse.

The dream from the other night has left me more than anxious and shaken up even though I didn't really hurt Stiles or anyone for that matter it's like this thing in my head reminding me that I can at any moment.

Something inside of me won't settle, it hasn't since we went back to the bus, it's almost like an alarm constantly going off in the back of my head.

Derek has proven he is a good guy once again by helping us work out what the dream was about. Scott got angry which equalled a broken locker whilst I started hearing voices which no sane person hears. Derek's help doesn't come for free apparently not that I can blame the guy he needs us to help him track down the alpha.

Jackson has become more adamant about finding out what Scott's secret is and the one time I don't want Jackson to be smart he is as he worked out that Scott doesn't want Allison finding out.

Scott cheats in bowling with his wolfie powers and I have the worse date known to man, but I guess it ended well as me and Stiles kissed. I'm starting to like Stiles as more than a friend, after all the kisses we shared I ought to, but I can't help but feel like I'm going to hurt him.

I mean I have zero control over my powers, and we don't even know the full extent of them.

God, when have I started thinking like this rather than normal teenage girl things? Anyway, Scott is even more love-sick that I thought, and Allison likes him a lot more than I thought she did.

Scott has finally got in his head that not everything is Derek's fault and that I was right all along, and he should definitely listen to me more, well maybe not the second bit, but one can hope. I now know for definite that Derek isn't the one who bit us, and I still can't stop thinking about the fact that Mr Meyers is dead, and I knew it was going to happen.

Anyway, needless to say today I've been a bit of with everyone I woke up in Stiles' arms which is becoming a regular occurrence and I honestly don't know how to feel about it. Even though me and Diego were never official, the fact that I already have more feelings for Stiles than I ever did him scares me.

So today I kept my distance from Stiles, not only because of my own overwhelming fear that I'm going to hurt him but also because I'm confused with what I want and it's not fair on him.

That's why currently I am sat on the couch with a massive glass of Jack Daniels as I contemplate my life decision, I'm tired and fed up but all I've done today is think about everything trying to wrap my head around it.

I left the house as soon as Stiles and Scott came in not talking to either boys and I spent most of the day with Lydia, Jackson, and Danny but now I'm home hating life and wanting to be alone.

But of course, this is when Stiles comes in because of course the observant boy noticed my distance and hesitance, and the big glass of Jack Daniels tells him that something is definitely wrong.

A TASTE OF HEAVEN •stiles stilinskiWhere stories live. Discover now