The Beauty & The Tragedy

Breathe You In

They didn't waste anytime when it came to starting the fifth album. They were excited and ready to get back into the studio. Since I was technically their boss, I made them record an acoustic album first. I'd wanted them to do one for the longest time. They spent three days recording it before turning in the final product. It was perfect. They changed up the arrangements on the songs and Demi and Lauren even sang lead on a couple of tracks.

They also surprised me when they agreed to film a documentary and out the band and give the world an inside look at their lives and how they operated. I had to sign a release and allow a camera crew to follow me around whenever I was with Demi or doing anything related to the band that the director found interesting. They were set to film one of the shows once the latest tour kicked off later in the year. It was a long filming process and everyone was actually excited about it.

I always loved when the band was in creative mode because it meant Demi was home. The house was always quiet and empty feeling when she was on the road. I was hoping to remedy this soon by bringing up the subject of kids once again. It had been a while since we'd last discussed it and I was hoping she might be ready. I know I was. She had originally asked me to wait three years but that was just too long. I was ready now and I had the time.

Her reasons for wanting to wait to very valid and made sense, but I just couldn't stop thinking about having a baby. It was like some sort of illness. I was obsessed. The thought of having miniature versions of either one of us made me have heart palpitations.

As I watched her sitting on the couch playing guitar, I realized that I didn't just want a baby. I wanted her baby. The way she loved me and the way she kept me safe was only confirmation of that feeling. She had a gentle presence and so much to offer a child. She'd been through it all and somehow managed to make it. She gave me her all no matter what and I knew that she would be an amazing mother.

She was humming softly as she played. I could tell she was working out a melody. Her fingers moved gracefully across the strings as she played, it was effortless and beautiful much like her. She was all of my wildest dreams come true. The expression on her face told me she was concentrating hard. She'd been asked to write and record a song for a soundtrack. She'd watched the movie a couple of times to find inspiration and now she was putting it all to words. She always told me that I was her greatest muse and no matter what she did, I could be found in everything she created.

Suddenly without warning, she stopped playing and turned around so she was facing me. Her dark brown eyes were intense as they settled on mine.

"What's on your mind?" She asked me with the slightest hint of a smile.

"How do you always know when I'm thinking about something serious?" I asked in amazement.

"Because." She said warmly. "I just do."

"What do you think about starting a family?" I asked nervously. "I mean I know we talked about it before and you said to wait three years but I'm honestly ready and I really think we can do it."

"I think." She paused and smiled. "We should do it."

"Are you serious?" I asked in shock. "Demi don't play with me..."

"I mean it Marie. Let's do it."

"Seriously?"

"Yes." She laughed. "Seriously.

"Oh my god baby!" I said as I threw myself into her arms. "We're really gonna do this?"

"Yes." She chuckled as she held me tightly.

I don't know why I was so surprised. There was no way she'd be able to tell me no. She couldn't. It was inscribed on the inside of my wedding band. The exact words were "I can't say no to you." I had her wrapped around my finger and I knew it. She knew it too but she didn't care. She just wanted me to be happy.