The Art of Pretending

Chapter Twenty Three

Blair POV.
•••

Hate. To feel intense or passionate dislike for someone. That someone happens to be, Grayson fucking Heart.

Why, you may ask? At the moment, there's a lot of reasons. It's been three weeks since the double date. Ashlyn and Grayson have already managed to break up. It has to do with something about Christmas break coming up.

Grayson told me they fought over his family. Ashlyn started off accusing them of hating her, and then I don't even know. At the end, they broke up.

But that's not why I hate Grayson. Because since Grayson is now single, he is back to using me as a distraction. He has me under his sick, twisted spell. So I can't help but to let him use me.

Our relationship is weird. It's as if we are dating, but he's in love with Ashlyn. I guess i'm just holding her place. Holy shit. I'm the mother fucking benchwarmer.

I hate Grayson fucking Heart. And I hate even more that, that statement is the farthest from the truth. I wish I hated him, instead I don't. For some reason I like the asshole. A lot. I've tried not to, I even went on a date a week ago. But I couldn't get away from him. On the date, I saw him everywhere. And his eyes, his stupid beautiful eyes.

It seemed as if nothing I'd do would let me escape the thought of him. He was everywhere. I saw a the grass, I though about the green flecks in his eyes. I looked at the sky, and I thought about the blue in his eyes. He was everywhere, and I couldn't escape him.

I hated that I didn't hate him. I hated even more that he has this hold over me. I wasn't great at hiding it either, and I think everyone knew, except for him.

I'm actually on my way to his house right now. Noah picked me up, and is taking me over to Grayson's. We were planning on drinking before we went to the party.

"I told Grayson you might like him." Those were the first words Noah chose to speak to me. They were traced with guilt and nerves. I knew something was up, he has been quiet to whole ride.

"Funny."

"No, I did."

"And why the fuck would you do that?" Anger, a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. Right now, the hostility factor was very high.

"Because, I think you do Blair. I don't just think you do, I know you do."

"Ok, well. Congrats, do you want a reward. The biggest fucking dumbass." Me being mad was an understatement. I was livid.

"I just didn't want you to get hurt. I see the way he treats you and I see the way you respond. It's obvious you like him. But the dumbass doesn't believe it. He said, and I quote, 'Nah, Blair wouldn't like a guy like me,' end quote."

"I hate men." Noah laughed at that.

"I'm sorry Blair. I just thought maybe he could tone his whole act down."

"His whole act?" I ask

"He acts like he likes you Blair, I don't know if you've noticed that. But everyone notices, even Ashlyn and him got in a fight over how close you two are. You guys have such a weird relationship, but I also know he's still in love with Ashlyn. So I thought, maybe if I told him you like him, he'd stop leading you on."

"And what do you think now?"

"That he's a bigger dumbass than I thought."

   "And why's that?"

   "Because he didn't believe anything I said."

"You shouldn't have said anything dumbass."