Vessel |-/ A Tyler Joseph FanFiction

Chapter 5: Guns For Hands

*May's POV*

The morning after I could still feel the velvety stroke of his lips on mine. I woke up without him next to me but oh god did I want that to be different. I checked my phone in hopes to have something from him. As soon as my eyes were able to properly focus on the phone screen I realized what just what I had done. Not only did I kiss the boy who's been lighting up my heart but I betrayed the one I'd known the longest. Alex. A missed call and a voicemail. Though the chances of him knowing about me and Tyler so early on were close to none I still couldn't help but feel like my stomach was trying to run away from my body. I love (or loved) Alex more than anyone else. I'd never thought this sort of thing would happen to someone like me. I never imagined that I'd do something like this to him. After minutes of watching hundreds of thoughts scroll through my mind I decided to open up the voicemail. "Hey, babe, it's me uhh.. I know you're probably still asleep now but maybe later we could try going out for some sushi or something? Whatever you want. Just call me back when you get the chance. Love you." I thought about going out to eat with Alex and maybe telling him about me and Tyler. But was I really ready to lose Alex? No. I had never been so sure that I've wanted a person so much for so long. I picked up the phone to call Alex back. "Hey umm sushi sounds great we could go for lunch maybe?" My head was spinning and my brain was stumbling about. "Babe... It's nearly three in the afternoon." No one had ever made my laziness sound so good. "Right. I knew that.. Um.. let's just do dinner later on tonight like um pick me up at seven?" Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. "Aha yeah that sounds good I'll see you then. Love you." He hadn't ended his sentence when I hung up on him. I love you too but I can't say it anymore. I spent the entire four hours I had getting ready. I looked in the mirror as I applied the last bit of lipstick and remembered something my mother had always told me, "The more you fix yourself up the more you have something to prove." Today that quote was relevant like never before. Why was I dressing up for Alex when he's seen me in every way shape and form possible? As usual he arrived quite early. I opened my door to see him standing there ready to kiss me. He pulled me in and I turned away. "I think I'm coming down with a little cold. Wouldn't want to get you sick now would I?" I could've definitely done better at picking out an excuse. "Right.. Um, you ready to go? You look amazing." He looked slightly disappointed but I couldn't kiss him when all I could think about was someone else. The ride to our destination was silent. We arrived at a small restaurant where we had one of out first dates. The place looked just as it had looked then however, it didn't feel the same. I couldn't bring myself to feel the same feeling I felt when I first came here with Alex. "So what'd you do last night, babe?" the way he asked the question was unnecessarily, possibly unintentionally, intimidating. Well, love of my life, I spent the night falling in love with someone new. Sorry. "I just went to the twenty one pilots show. Other than that it was pretty uneventful." I couldn't even look him straight in the eye when I lied to him. I sat there stirring my iced tea with my straw. "Oh, yeah, how was it?" "It was good. I didn't stay long. I just watched the show and got right back home. Enough about me. What did you do last night?"

*Alex's POV*

"I just stayed home, really." I didn't know how to tell her that I was so scared of losing her to Tyler. I loved May more than I've ever loved anyone else. I just wish I knew what she thought. The night carried on and there was nothing but small talk. Painful small talk. I payed the check and met her in the car. She sat there staring at nothing. "May?" it was time to speak up. If I don't say anything I could lose her. She lifted her head and moved her hair off of her face. "Yeah?" "May, I love you. I don't want to lose you. I don't know how close you are with Tyler and I ' want to know but, May, I don't want you to go. I trust you so much and I'm not accusing you of anything. I just need you to know that I don't want to lose you." By the time I finished

*May's POV*

Alex had never been so upfront about his feelings. I know what he wants. Reassurance. But, how can I give him what he wants when I don't know what I want. I was running out of time before I could answer. "Alex, I love you. I mean it. I love you so much. I'm so sorry for making you feel this way. Take me home." I loved Alex and I wanted to give him everything he deserved. Maybe one night together can reignite what I felt for him. "Take you home?" he asked in confusion. I smirked at him. "Oh! Like t-take you home? Like you wanna uhhh?" "Yes! Alex let's go home!" He started driving a little faster than he probably should have. I unlocked the door and locked it immediately after we both were inside my apartment. He kissed my forehead like millions of times before. "Are you sure?" he asked. This wasn't our first time but for some reason he always wanted to make sure I was okay with it. I nodded and he began to kiss my lips. We kissed from the front door to the bedroom. He lifted off my shirt while I unbuttoned his. I felt the electricity I had longed for desperately running through my veins. He layed me down and unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans. He kissed my neck softly and moved downwards making each kiss more intense.