In My Dreams (A Taekook Military Romance Drama)

Bloody Tears

A week had passed since Taehyung's last nightmare, and so he felt himself breathing a little bit easier. He opened the sliding door, and stepped out onto the terrace. He took a deep breath. The benefit of a penthouse apartment was his own rooftop garden. There was grass, bamboo, many potted plants, and a peach tree. The chilly early spring morning invigorated him. April was here, and buds were just starting to pop with little bursts of green everywhere he looked. Yeontan trotted out the door, and licked Tae's toes, giving him many little kisses.

Taehyung knelt down and patted his cherished puppy, and kissed his nose. "Do you love me Tani? Do you love Appa?" Tani gave a little bark, and Tae cuddled him. "Let's get you some breakfast. Go poopoo first!" Tae put him down, and gave his bottom a little pat, communicating it was business time. When they were back inside, Tae placed a special breakfast of kibble and leftover grilled chicken in Yeontan's bowl. Then he went to shower and get ready for work.

He'd been home from the military for three months, and it would be his first day back at Hybe. He thought back to when their label was called BigHit... It felt so far away. But now BTS was nearly reunited. When Jungkook would come home in less than a year, they'd be fully back together again. All the members were excitedly counting down the days for their beloved Maknae to return, yet Taehyung was a wreck. He hadn't taken well to the military environment. It felt brutal to him. He'd missed his dog, his home, his favorite foods, his phone, movies, flowers, everything about life. The isolation wasn't good for him mentally. He became retreated, and even had a hard time making friends, which was usually so natural for him.

Not to mention what he saw. The image that still haunts him at night. The day that scarred him, and now swims in his psyche, toying with his mind and eating him alive from the inside out. Now that he was home, he felt wounded, and was afraid to reintegrate. But he wouldn't think about all that this morning. He put on his favorite sweater vest, and called Jimin to come pick him up.

...

Jungkook was in the gym today, which was one of the few pastimes allowed to soldiers. He was pressing 350 now, and was on his eighth rep of the morning, pushing his bulging biceps to their limit. As he puffed out each labored exhale, he thought about his hyungs, wondering what they were all up to. It was sad to know that they were creating music without him. Yoongi's birthday was a few weeks back, and Jungkook imagined them celebrating. He was never extra close with Suga-Hyung, but he missed him. The members probably bought him a cake. Jungkook would kill for a slice of cake right now.

He thought about Jin, who'd been out of the military for years. They became surprisingly close after he got back, while they were each other's constant as every other member took their leave. They enjoyed gaming together, eating together, and being stupid together. They even wrote a few songs, which stayed in the back of their notebooks, and never got produced. He missed his "baby-Hyung" as he got way with calling him only twice, when they were wasted. He missed Hobi, who could make him laugh in the hardest times, Namjoon as his daily leader, Jimin's salty-sweetness, and the natural feeling of having all his hyungs nearby. But he wouldn't let himself think about Taehyung. He missed him more than life itself, more than music, sex, or new tattoos. Yet the painful longing for him was charred with betrayal, and Jungkook buried it deeper.

...

"You look like shit."

"Thanks Jimin-ah, great to see you too."

Tae fastened his seatbelt and flipped Jimin off. They both chuckled, and Jimin placed a caring hand on his best friend's shoulder for a moment.

"Are you sure you're ready? You don't have-"

"I'm going. It has to happen at some point, and I really need to get out of the house. Maybe working will help me forget."

Jimin gave Tae a gentle smile, and stepped on the gas. "Ok then. Let's go."

Taehyung didn't tell Jimin everything, but he told him enough. They'd stayed up all night their first day back, and talked until the sun came up. They shared stories and experiences from their platoons, and vented about how much being in the army sucked. But it took a turn around 4am. Tae told Jimin a secret. He could technically have been arrested for telling him about the night his unit was sent to a specific spot at the North Korean border. What they witnessed and what they had to do. Jimin was in shock. He'd heard whispered rumors of that sort of thing, but it was like the unicorn of the military. It wasn't supposed to actually exist. It was supposed to be a cautionary tale to keep them subordinate, and imagine that it could be worse. He swore to Tae that he'd never breath a word about it, and they sealed the promise with a pinky swear. It was a serious contract. A vow.

And Jimin now took on the role of Taehyung's protector. He wanted to make sure he took it easy as they headed together to work, and to see their hyungs, for the first time in two years. So Jimin blasted the radio and let down the top of his convertible, and and they sang and laughed, psyching themselves up for their welcome back party.

...

It was past midnight. Jungkook was tossing and turning in his cot, making little squeaks of the metal springs, amongst the countless snoring men. He didn't know that he was safe in his barracks, because he wasn't there.

Behind his closed eyes Jungkook was in a desolate field, watching as a group of men stood in line, and lifted their guns. They pointed towards the barbed wire fence, looking through their viewfinders in unison. He was so afraid of what he about to see, but he was frozen like a statue. Couldn't even blink. The commander screamed "NOW!" and all men started firing their machine guns, every bullet flying meticulously through the diamond shapes of the wire fence. The was a bloodcurdling scream and one of them men collapsed. The others ignored him, as if he wasn't there, and kept their aim, kept on shooting. Suddenly, somehow, Jungkook was floating toward the action. His feet hovered inches above the ground, as an invisible wind-like force swept him forward. He landed in the middle of the fray, and the bullets passed through him as if he were made of air.

Without knowing why, he bent down to see who the collapsed man was. Jungkook laid flat on his stomach, and inched forward so he was face to face with him. It was Taehyung. He was white as a ghost, and his eyes were wide orbs, as if his lids were stitched open. Scarlet tears of blood started leaking out of the inner corners of his eyes, and Jungkook's heart leapt in fear. But his body was stone again. He couldn't move, he could only scream. "Taehyung! Taehyung!! Tae!! TAEHYUNG!!" And then Tae's eyes locked with his own. Tae reached for Jungkook's face, and pulled him into a kiss. Jungkook tasted blood, like Tae's saliva had turned to blood too. But they kissed harder, and Taehyung's bloody tears got all over Jungkook's face, and ran down his neck, and swished between their tongues. Bullets were still flying around them, but Taehyung wouldn't pull his lips away. Jungkook was frightened, but he knew if he broke the kiss Taehyung would die. So he kept kissing him.

And then suddenly everything was shaking.

"Wake up. Hey! Wake up!"

Jungkook's eyes opened to blurry dark shapes, and he saw his comrade from the next cot kneeling beside him. He'd shaken him awake again, but had a look of concern on his face. It wasn't morning.

"Are you ok? Your mumbling woke me up, but then your face got all white and sweaty. Should I call the medic?"

Jungkook sat up, and unexpectedly vomited on the floor.

"Shit. I must be really dehydrated."

"I'll get you some water, just lay down."

Jungkook wiped his mouth on his wrist and laid staring at the sealing, his chest heaving, trying to steady himself, until the guy returned with a water bottle, and a towel.

Jungkook downed the water in 5 seconds. "Stop, I'll do it."

He had been about to clean Jungkook's sick off the floor, but JK got up and yanked the towel away to do it himself. He had too much pride to let someone else do that. And his mind was spinning. He couldn't sit still. What the fuck was that dream? And why did it come back now?