Love Game || CHANLIX

•7•

"You're an idiot." Changbin had made his way to the studio after witnessing Felix's breakdown. Knowing Chan was so obviously the cause of his distress, he made it his mission to finally have a confrontation, seeing as he delayed this interaction for too long.

Seeing the young boy in tears today had made something snap deep within him. Chan's behaviour had worsened, he knew that. Yet he tolerated it. He tolerated every sarcastic comment, judgemental tone and dirty looks. Why? Because he was his Hyung.

But now, things have changed. He could handle himself being talked down to, being hurt and being criticised. What he could not handle was the mistreatment of his members. Especially when it came to his dongsaengs. His maknaes.

"I know." Frustrated with Chan's answer, he ran his hand through the stiffness of his hair, releasing a breath that he wasn't aware of holding.

"Felix is hurt-" Cut off by Chan only angered him more, although trying his best to keep his calm.

"I know." Chan knew? He fucking knew? Did he? Or was that just a pathetic excuse of a reply so he would be left alone. Changbin couldn't allow this.

"Why did you do it?" Growing annoyed with Chan's lack of responses, he finally queried the question that lurked every inch of his mind.

"That- I don't- I can't answer that." Chan swallowed a dry gulp. He felt guilty but angry. Angry at Felix? For tempting him into his lust? But no... How could he? How could he blame him when there was no temptation involved? He had only tempted himself. But of course, Chan's mind loved to manipulate his thoughts, thinking of any excuse for justification.

Felix was innocent, he concluded that at least. None of the blame should be burdened upon his small, delicate shoulders. Only himself was to blame. He acted his promiscuous intentions on Felix, despite his own pleas of not doing so just hours prior to the scene in the bathroom.

Yes, he promised. He swore not to sprinkle his sins on Felix, but yet that's exactly what he did and now that very same broken promise had left Felix with tears flowing through his chest. He knew it would hurt him, but did that stop him? Clearly not.

"Looks like you don't know everything." Changbin had muttered in a low voice, which only left Chan silent. He felt dumb. Stupid. Weak. He was being talked down upon and he knew he deserved it. Hence, he let it happen.

Maybe his mind would also manipulate him by believing he was angry at Changbin. For Changbin to barge into their studio, interrupting him from the thoughts of Felix's tear stricken face; the flashbacks of every pleasure that Felix's body held; the sounds of spanks from Felix's flesh resonating through the bathroom; the feeling of Felix's skin burning his fingertips. Felix.

Felix. Felix. Felix.

Everything his mind raced about lead back to Felix, and his shame only grew larger.

Was he angry at Changbin? No... Maybe he should thank him for ridding the screams of embarrassment jolting through him. Changbin was here, talking to him. Maybe not for him necessarily, but he was here. Chan needed that.

The only other suspect for his rage is well... Himself. Yes, himself. How foolish of him to put the fault on others, one who is the victim and one who isn't even involved in the slightest? Of course, his involvement was only apparent as confusion and the hurt of his heart present, seeing his friend he loved so dearly, in pain. How could he blame anyone but himself?