POV you get adopted by Bo Burnham

Adventurez at the groc store

at the grocery store, bo holds the door open for you yet again. He struggles against the power of it though, because it is an automatic door. Such a gentleman.

"So," he says, strolling leisurely down the first aisle. "What do you want to make?"

"I don't know. " you reply.

He points at a loaf of bread. "lofe bred:)??"

"uh... not unless we are making sandwiches?" You respond.

"you're right." He says.

He points at a watermelon. "Wartmeln:):)?"

"No, bo." You shake your head. "We are making dinner. We should figure out what we want our main dish to be first, then we get ingredients.

"Right." he nods. "What is your favoriet food?"

You think. "We should get chicken and peanut butter." You suggest.

"I've never tried that." Bo says. "You'll have to show me where to get the igredients.

You laugh. "Silly BO. We don't need ingredients. Its pre-made.'

You walk. And walk some more. and walk somemore. Finally you find the cans. You slap them real hard, and sigh.

"THe good stuff."

"What the fuck." Bo says.

"What?" You ask.

"THis is fucking dog food."

You look at teh label. You don't know how to read of course, but the dog on the logo suddenly makes a lot of sense.

"You mean to tell me that this is food. For dogs."

"Yeah." BO says.

He is very concerned for you. You are also very concerned for you.

He cups your face in his palms.

"Poor child." He whispers, a tear falling down his bearded cheek. "Have you been eating dog food your whole life??"

Your lip quivers. yOu cannot belive it. so sad.

"Y-y0y-y-y-y--y-y--yy-y-es." You cry.

"FORGET MAKIN DINNE" HE SHOUTS< TURNING THE HEADS OF ANYOne in a Ten mile radius. "WE ARE GOING TO GO OUT TO RESTRANT AND BUY YOU EVERYTHING TO EAT."

You are smacked in the face by a wing that bursts from his back, ripping his shirt, and exposing his handsome muscles. He sweeps you up into his arms, and shoots like a bullet through the store. This time, he does not hold open the door, but breaks right through it and into the sky. You soar above the town, and gasp at the beauty of the whole world below you. You have never left your washing machine hole before, let alone, flew through the sky in the arms of an angelic lumberjack man.

"WHAT ABOUT The VAN?" You shout over the ripping of the wind.

"We LEAVE IT" He shouts back. "I HAVE MANY MORE WAITING IN THE  V O I D"

"NOW WHERE DO YOU WANT TO EAT?" HE SHOUTS

"I DON"T KNOW" YOU SHOUT" REMEMEBER I NEVER LEFT MY WASHING MACHINE HOLE"

"OH YEAH." A coy grin flashes a cross his face. "Then we'll go to my favorite:

"OLIVE GARDEN"