We need to have some rules."
I turn around to see Jiyeon standing by me, looking very stern, which is unusual for her. I frown at her statement trying to figure out what she meant. We had dorm rules and strict rules to follow if we wanted to continue being idols.. I didn't know what other rules we needed.
"Rules? What rules? The group already has - "
Jiyeon put her finger dangerously close to my lip and said, "Not rules for the group. Just rules for us."
I gave her a dubious look, and raised at eyebrow.
"We're obviously attracted to one another," she said, bluntly.
And when she said that, it was like a weight was lifted off of my chest. We had been denying it so long, it was nice to finally admit it and have it out in the open.
"But we can't act on that attraction."
I bit my lip, and nodded, trying to hide my disappointment.
"So we need rules," she repeated.
"We can't be in a room alone together for too long. Especially one with couches or beds."
I groaned inwardly. Jiyeon and I spent far too much time together especially during promotions for us to follow these rules. We had so many late night talks and movie marathons. If we had to stop, if that were to go away, I don't know what I would do. But I bit my tongue, nodding again.
"And you can't wear that stupid leather jacket," she added.
My jaw almost dropped when I heard that. My reactions were very muddled - shocked, confused, bemused, amused, flattered...
"What?" I blurt out. "I love that jacket"
"Me too," she said, looking up at me. "That's the problem. It...y'know, hugs your shoulders in a certain way. And it's so bad ass for Christ's sake, . How can I not be attracted to you when your wearing that. that is just too much."
I couldn't tell if she was being serious. It seemed like a ridiculous request. It all seemed ridiculous. Why couldn't we just be who we were and be fine with it? I didn't like this rules thing. Not one bit.
"And stop biting on your bottom lip whenever you talk," Jiyeon demanded, dominantly.
"Whoa there." I looked into her hazel eyes and started getting...angry, happy, turned on? "Well then you can't wear that black dress."
Jiyeon's lips turned into the cutest pout I've ever seen on a human being. How am I supposed to not be attracted to her?
"But that's the dress I look best in."
"That's the problem," I said, repeating her answer from before. "And you can't do that eye smile thing either."
"Eye smile thing?" Jiyeon'raised her eyebrows.
"When you smile, your eyes go closed a little bit." I demonstrated. "That's just not fair."
Jiyeon sighed, clearly exasperated.
"How can I control my smile? And why does it bother you so much?"
Before I could filter my words I said, "Because it makes me want to kiss you"
I put my hand over my mouth as both of our mouths opened in surprise. I took a step back.
"I...I'm sorry, Jiyeon-ssi."
Jiyeon looked down and rubbed her temples. I couldn't tell what she was thinking. Which is weird, because I know her like the back of my hand. I can tell when she's lying, when she's sad, when she's pretending to like someone's cooking when she really just wants to eat mint choco ice-cream.. But this look? It looked...hurt, confused, shocked, disgusted and something else. But why on earth would she be hurt?
"You're sorry?" she asked.
"I don't know where that came from," I lied. "I'm serious, no idea."
"Oh."
Her small frame turned to walk away but I put my hand on her shoulder.
"Wait...what did I do wrong?"
Jiyeon laughed and shook her head. God damn it, I had to add another rule about her laughing. And her dancing. "Nothing, forget it."
Now I knew something was seriously wrong. She never talks to me like this. I've never had her dismiss me this easily. And she's never told me to forget something she said. Because she knows I wouldn't.
"No," I stated. "I won't forget it. What's wrong?"
I frowned and looked at her for any clue as to if she would answer. When I got no answer, I stepped closer to her and stroked her hair. I cupped her cheeks so she was looking at me.
"Hey," I whispered. "It's just me. It's okay. Tell me what's going on."
Jiyeon parted her lips as to say something but then closed them and sighed. She took my hands away from her and crossed her arms.
"You...you can't say things like that Hyunjung ," she growled. "Like that you want to make out with me and then say it didn't mean anything. And that it was a mistake."
My jaw dropped. She was hurt that I took back my statement? My initial reaction was pure joy - but then the feeling of reality set in. I had to take it back. It was Jiyeon who said that we couldn't act on it.
"You said we can't act on it," I mumbled. I fiddled with my fingers, anxious for her response. Her response was to take my fidgety hands into her own and kiss my knuckles.
"What the hell do I know?" She laughed.
"You...I mean...we...we can act on it?" I felt a small smile come on my lips. "You want to act on it?"
Instead of a verbal answer, I got a physical one. She grabbed the collar of my shirt firmly, and then suddenly I tasted her cherry lipgloss. Our mouths were touching as if our lives depended on it. I gasped and leaned into the kiss. She wrapped her arms around my neck and I wrapped mine around her small waist. I smiled against her lips as we both pulled away.
"The...rules" she whispered softly, the rules can go, before smiling into our fist kiss.
