♥︎ polygrumps : pen and paper ♥︎

RazzaRoss: Golden

a/n listen to golden by fall out boy, it's a sad, short song. also, no synopsis, i want you to see how bad it is :)

'How cruel is the golden rule?
When the loves we lived are only golden-plated'

Mom had always told Ross to be safe, and to stay away from strangers. When he had to introduce the new sexual orientation he was, Mom had asked how, and why. The flashback was torture for him, and he remembered every word. 'Barry..he's so perfect. He's cute, caring, kind..' 'Barry?! I told you to stay away from him..' 'Mom! You never mer him, he's super sweet and he wouldn't hurt me..besides, he likes me and I like him!' 'You're gay and you're dating him?' 'Well, no, we had to see if it was okay with family and friends..' 'I want you to stay away from him, he will hurt you..' Ross had stopped playing it; his hands shook and his knees buckled, and soon he collapsed on the cold, wooded floor.

'And I knew that the lights of the city were too heavy for me
Though I carried karats for everyone to see..'

Ross had finally took his mother's advice, and Barry didn't know. All day, he would try to talk to Ross, but he would bolt off and avoid every contact with him. This made Barry worried about him, and asked Arin about it. The conversation was simple; 'Ross's mother told him to stay away from you.' It left an imprint on his heart, and he wouldn't find anyone better. And it made him think..was everyone avoiding him?

'And I saw God cry in the reflection of my enemies
And all the lovers with no time for me
And all of the mothers raise their babies
To stay away from me'

"Was I a monster to you..?" Barry spoke, trying to get Ross's attention. And it did, and it hurt. "I-I'm just following mother's orders.." Ross choked out, soon walking a little faster. He gripped the other's arm and spun him around, holding both his wrists to prevent him from leaving. "Why, though? You knew I loved you 'til it hurt me.." Ross blinked, then his mouth opened. "Loved..? As in, I made you lose your feelings for me..?" He simply nodded, a small amount of feelings flooding back in. "And I missed you, and now everyone's avoiding me.." Ross blinked a couple times, before jerking his hands away and running. "I-I'm sorry Barry, I can't be with you.."

'Tongues on the sockets of electric dreams
Where the sewage of youth drown the spark of my teens
And I knew that the lights of the city were too heavy for me
Though I carried karats for everyone to see'

Barry kicked rocks out of his way as he strolled through the rain, hands in hoodie pockets and head bowed to the ground. He didn't know what to do; every moment that he spent with Game Grumps just evaporated into thin air. Like it wasn't anything. Like he wasn't there. Like he was thrown to the side, laughed at by all. His chest burned, his throat was itchy and dry, and his eyes stung badly. His phone would buzz and ring frantically and he would ignore it. It wasn't Ross, why would it be? He crossed the road quickly, and decided to check his phone. To his surprise, it was Ross. But text after text led him that he was just going to break him again. And he contemplated something daring..

'And I saw God cry in the reflection of my enemies
And all the lovers with no time for me
And all of the mothers raise their babies
To stay away from me'

He roamed the sidewalks until he found a busy intersection. People stared at him, but didn't bother him. He saw an open lane and crossed it as fast as he could. And a truck turned down that lane as soon as he started booking it. Blood filling the air and sudden stops of traffic busted into accident after accident. He could barely move, the truck had hit him slowly but hard. His phone spilled out of his pocket, and he suddenly saw black. People gasping, sirens wailing, but most importantly, no friends crying. That's all he heard. Until the text tone of his phone rang in his ears, and a small smile cracked off his lips, before finally closing off the sound.

'And pray they don't grow up to be'

Ross [ 7:14 PM ]: I love you..