uh oh! (Aaron hotchner)

Chapter 9

Did you really want to die?"
"No one commits suicide because they want to die."
"Then why do they do it?"
"Because they want to stop the pain.
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Hi ! Guys Um so this chapter will be a bit about suicide. Because every once in a while someone will go through things in life and the first thing people want to do is end there life because they hat life so much. And honestly self-harm is never the answer. I would know because I used to cut myself. I hate my family, they will tell me the small things I did wrong or what I need to do and it's hurt me so much I cut myself just to numb the pain. One day during p.e in high school my p.e teacher saw my arm and asked about it I lied and said a cat did but she knew I was lying so she asked again and I told her why I did it. She cryed I cryed and she told me that I have people who love me and will miss me . And she was right . Well until i start cutting again in my senior year and another teacher said the same thing. And that when I stop . I really do have people who care and love me. I have people to talk to my life some who I can text my feelings and talk about how much I hate myself. Someone who will listen to you and tell you that you do mater someone who is always there for you. Tell a stranger a friend a teacher what's going on in your life just to get it off your chest. Talk to someone get the help you need .
~ ❤️ alyssa

Y/n are you going to ride with me today. Um oh no Aaron I'm not feeling too good I'm might come in during lunch unless if we got a case then I'll go. Y/n I'll have Emily come by during lunch. Fine Aaron I love you. Love you more y/n .

There I was taking a shower, well more like leaving the hot water on. I set on the bathroom floor and I broke a blade off the razor, I brought it to my wrist and I did four cut two where deep and two where not deep. Just then my phone goes off. I answered,
" hey it's Em I'm outside open up"
At first all I could do was heavy breathing
And then I managed to get out was help me before I realized I was passed out on the floor but I hard the door being kicked in.

Shit y/n what where you thinking , you had the perfect life a family. " I'm sorry Em" was all I got out before walking up in the hospital.

Em: hey Hotch it's y/n
Aaron: what about y/n
Em: she sliced her wrist, I got here in time before she lost too much blood but Hotch I don't know why she did it were here at the hospital
Aaron: ok thanks Emily, stay with y/n and I'm on my way

.......
15 year old y/n

" I hate you" , you can't do this . Y/n your 15 and pregnant. This is your fault your the one who raped me . You did this to my body. Now y/n I'm sorry but you need to get rid of the baby. Or what ? Well I can kill you .
Next thing I know my best friend of 15 years pulled out a knife and stabbed me in the stomach, but I killed him with one gunshot.

No please don't kill me. ahhhhh. Y/n it's okay it's me Emily and Aaron please wake up it's just a dream. There I was opening my eyes to see myself in a hospital bed with a wrapped around my arm. I'm sorry Aaron I don't know why I did it. It's okay y/n all that matters is you and the baby is safe. Y/n Aaron is right you and your baby is all that matters of being alive and we both love you, your family. Thanks Em I love you guys too.

That night i was discharged from the hospital, Aaron pick up takeout got a bath start.Aaron got in behind me I laid my head on his chest, y/n can you please talk to me, what happened. When I was 15 I had this best guy friend one day we went to a high school party we drunk so much but I wasn't drunk so he took me home , he then tried to kiss me but I close my door and he forced his was in and he took advantage of me and raped me. When Jason found out I was pregnant he wanted the baby dead , so one night he came over and as we're going homework he stabbed me in my stomach, but then I shot him. But the time I was at hospital they told me that I lost the baby. Aaron it's just I don't want anything to happen to this baby, I guess I got scared that the same thing would happen again to me. Y/n I will never hurt you or our baby because I love you so much. I love you too Aaron. We got out of the bath tub and we ate and fell asleep cuddling while I cryed myself to sleep. Goodnight y/n I love you . Goodnight Aaron I love you too.

It was the next morning and I threw on a white see though long sleeve with black skirt. And I road into work with Aaron. I got off scared of what they will think, y/n it's okay all they know it's you slipped in the bath. Thanks Aaron. There we are in the elevator getting off on the sixth floor.  I walked in through the glass door all eyes where on me. I saw Derek and Dave talking JJ and Spencer talking and Penelope and Em where talking.

Well look who's back "Dave said"
y/n your back " Derek said"
As we hugged all around I knew I forgot to do something.
Y/n your arm is bleeding " Spencer said"
Ooh um  it's from a red pen , Em help me please

I knew coming back was horrible, y/n no it's not ( unwrap the bandage cleaning it up) Em I shouldn't be her , I woke with profiler they're going to find out the truth. As we were waiting for the cut to dry up to add a fresh bandage, we didn't notice JJ . Y/n you cut yourself, w-what why . JJ it's okay I'm fine, no your not if your cutting yourself, that how I watch my sisters die and I did nothing to stop her. Jennifer listen to me I'm here ok I'm alive and I'm fine, it was because of something that happened in my past that I was scared of now. Y/n I'm sorry about Spencer , JJ it's okay I promise. Yes I was upset about it but I'm fine now . Good because y/n I miss you and our girls night. I miss you too JJ. We hugged it out and we made our way back. We all linked arms laughing and smiling.