quiet // taeyong ff

19

i'm not sure how to feel

happy

sad

?

it's all a blur

he left me

but he left me with such words

such powerful words

and it's not fair

it's not fair

it's not fair that he doesn't know how affective it is, especially with my phone's light glowing on my face with a missed call as the second notification

and the first

a text

"i miss you," - taeyong

how can he miss me? he had the chance to stay but he left with his friends

so i decided to call back

and on the other line was taeyong's honey sweet voice but this time it sounded less sweet and more,
unstable and tired

he sounded drunk

"i'm not drunk, i just had a bit to smoke with my friends," he laughed on the other line

smoking

wow

weed

wow

i felt my heart suddenly clench and my throat becoming dry as i quickly ended the call,

tears now glew in my eyes like shards of glass, why does it hurt

⚠️ SELF HARM MENTIONS ⚠️

A/N - please skip this if your sensitive to self harm mentions, i love you <3

it hurts

oh it hurts so much

i cant tell what hurts more, hearing him smoke weed, him saying random shit because he's high, him now choosing his friends over me

or

the fresh burns now appearing around my arm, the skin scarring around it like a protecter

oh it hurts so much