𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐒𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 - 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐱 𝐨𝐜

𝐭𝐰𝐨!

you're a fucking asshole.
i take it all back—you're not a legend

asshole
uh oh

you know how humiliating it was to
walk in class, thank Salome for the hw
answers only for them to tell me i never
texted them??

asshole
ah...

and then i had to completely redo
the assignment one minute before
the prof collects it???

incredibly disrespectful.

asshole
but i AM salome :)

yeah, and i'm the girl who definitely
got a C on my assignment

asshole
ur a girl?

and i presume you're a 70 yr old man
who's gonna offer to be my sugar daddy?

asshole
unfortunately not

a shame. i would've been so happy

asshole
W H A T ????

buddy if you take everything i've said and
put two and two together, it's pretty
obvious i'm a broke college student

asshole
dude you're giving me so much
info about yourself. what if i
was a murderer? a serial killer??

honestly if you were, i'd be so relieved.
like yes, pls get me out of here i don't
wanna be in florida anymore

asshole
that bad??

i hate people.

asshole
fair enough

......
is it rowan again?

god i hate the bastard
and yet

asshole
and yet?

i didn't mean that

asshole
wait what don't you mean? (read)
wait (read)
HOLLLD UP (read)
YOU DONT MEAN TO SAY THAT— (read)

shut up

asshole
make me

i never said it, therefore it is not true <3

asshole
do you actually like him?? after you've
called him an asshole like five times??

dude i know nothing about you yet you're
so invested in my love life? or. lack of thereof.

asshole
i'm invested 🤷‍♂️

gimme two facts cuz you already
know two ab me :/

asshole
fine, deal.

my name is jared :) and my
20th birthday is in two months

i'm not a dumbass. i'm a woman of
culture as well

we have the same area code so—
what part of florida?

asshole
confidential.

fine. be like that. see ya later # boy

asshole
i'm not attached to you. see ya
later # girl (delivered)

20 MINUTES LATER

asshole
wait come back (delivered)

i'm bored (delivered)

did you actually leave :( (delivered)

jesus christ fine (delivered)

asshole
1, orlando ://
2, i don't go to college
and just so you owe me one, 3: i'm def a guy

the "definitely" makes it sound sarcastic ngl

asshole
wanna see proof? ;)

doesn't sound like you have
much to show :)

asshole
ouch. you sure know how
to bruise an ego.

aw thanks :) i learned from rowan

asshole
oh? 😏

you have to learn when he starts
throwing insults at you from
across the kitchen.

asshole
oh? do you work at a restaurant?

that's my third fact for you.

asshole
is it hard?

meh. i enjoy it sometimes. plus
old men tip well hehe. i take it as
a dub.

asshole
doesn't sound like a dub to me

again. best i could get.
therefore why i don't mind if ur
actually a,, you know.

asshole
unfortunately i am not

a shame.

bringing how much of an asshole you
are, rowan's yelling at me bc you
distracted me and i gotta clean

asshole
does he help in the old men situations?

lmao no. i don't think he even
knows it happens.

oops, that's enough oversharing for
tonight. gotta go serve people and
not trip over my own feet

see you maybe?

asshole
oh? 👀

on second thought, maybe not <3

asshole
don't think about me when you're
walking cuz i'm sure you'll fall head
over heels :))

i hate you.

asshole
no you don't <3

AUTHOR'S NOTE

i have discovered i am horrible at writing text-message stories but honestly im only doing this so i can get out of my writing slump so please give me validation even tho it's not the best <3333

7.6.21