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o n e h u n d r e d - s e v e n t y - n i n e

Tomorrow is the day. I feel overwhelmed by this big step we're taking. I feel my legs shaking whenever I think about it. I'm getting married, wow, it really feels awkward to be aware of this and [feels also] pretty frightening to be honest. I'm marrying the man I truly love. The same man I swore to God I would have never come back together.

«...and they called and told us they can't stock the venue with tequila today because the truck that was delivering the stocks got into a crash», Perrie sadly announces. What the hell?
«Please, tell me you're joking. You are? Okay, I forgive you. Uh, you almost got me. No, you totally got me», I'm making it very dramatic. I don't know why Perrie made that up, she really got me and my anxiety jumped up. And now she's sitting [beside to me] on her chair laughing about me.
«That was mean, Perrie!», I squeal. «Why on hearth would you do that to me?».
«I don't know», she shrugs. «You weren't actually paying attention to me, we were in the middle of a conversation and I could see your brain isolating yourself from our talk».
«I was.. Mh, you know what? It was nothing,» it seemed like I didn't want her to know what I was feeling whenever the thought of getting married crossed my mind. «Still wondering which acrylic set I should get for the big day».

She gave me the look. Whenever she senses I'm lying — which she's pretty good at — she serves me the look (Harry and I are scared as fuck of that eye contact she makes).  «What?», I squeal again and, ladies and gentlemen, this time it was unintended.
«Spill the tea», the do I really have to look on my face.
«I really love this set, I think it matches my maid of honor's dress, innit?».
«Totally», I fake a smile. I'm not ready for the conversation.
I take a deep breathe until I'm ready, «doesn't it feel unreal? I'm getting married, Perrie. Every time I think about it my legs start shaking and my heart beasts so fast. You know, that kind of butterflies in my stomach situation. And it feels weird to me after yesterday's fight».
«Oooh, no babe, it's okay. Don't cry», she tries to stand up and reach me so she can hug me, but her nail tech pulls her down. And I keep crying. Tears rolling on my face.
«Forget about yesterday's fight. She intentionally made you two arguing. Somehow she realized what she's lost and wants it back. But she can't have it [because] he's committing to you. He's literally going to say yes, taking you as his wife for the rest of his life. It's you that he wants, not her! It's always been you».