lessons [wk]

- 03

"let's go mar, it's noon!"

i press my face harder into the mattress at kalynn's yelling outside of the door. it seems the melt down from last night really exhausted me. now, it's twelve pm, and i'm no where near awake enough to stand.

reluctantly, i roll over under the weight of my blankets to face the ceiling. my back hurts, my eyes are puffy, and my face feels hot. small cries and sniffles echoed around my room throughout the entirety of the night. i don't cry often, and when i do, it takes time to come to a complete stop.

i've been over thinking the argument with weston for hours now. hes never been so mad at me, and hes never seen me get just as angry back to him.

the way he left things is itching at my mind. it was so sudden, and so unexpected. all i could do was try and force myself to stop thinking about it. however, that was hard when i could literally hear westons voice outside of your door.

i can tell they're filming a coffee cam. being completely honest, i don't care that they didn't wait for me. i think kalynn knows i need some time to wake up.

i step off of my bed after some time just staring at the ceiling. i feel like crying as soon as i do; it's like i opened up a dam and it won't stop pouring out.

sucking up my tears, i stand up and head over towards my dresser. my clothes are carelessly squished together in each of the drawers. each one has the exact same color pallet though, which makes it seem a bit neater than it is.

oranges, browns, blacks, and greens flood my tainted eyes as i try and piece together an outfit in my mind. my head throbs as i pull out a few pieces of clothes to layer.

i slip on a pair of black fishnets, my toes getting caught between the holes as i do so. i put on a pair of ripped loose jeans over them. this way the fishnet design will peak through the rips of the distressed jeans.

a black bra stares at me at the brim of my dresser, almost begging me to wear it. i can't remember the last time i wore a bra with a sweater.

i decide to throw it on, and hope that it'll wake me up more. on top of that i throw some random sweater over my head, and just guess that it matches the rest of the outfit.

weston and kalynn continue to talk to the camera out in the other room. i can tell they're stalling a bit, probably waiting for me so that we can all go and actually get the coffee.

in a rush, i clasp and shove some shitty jewelry on and do some quick makeup. i leave my hair down, and finally make my way out into the living room with my two roommates.

"ah, here she is!" kalynn notices me first, moving the camera towards me. i smile lightly, and move closer to the counter.

"morning," i greet as i reach into the glasses cabinet, and grab a glass to fill with ice water before heading out.

"morning," westons voice sound rough, as if he hadn't slept all night. i turn around to face him and i'm met with nothing but that.

his face still has a hint of morning puffiness, and the dark circles under his eyes are a strong giveaway. i wanted to think that it's because of what happened last night, but i know i could be wrong.

hes wearing a light blue sweater and some jeans, and he already has his white converse on and ready to leave the apartment.

kalynn turns off the camera at our small interaction. she's probably expecting the conversation to elaborate, but neither of us are sure that it'll happen. time will tell.

"how'd you sleep?" i decide to push further.

"like shit," his arms are pent up on top of the counter as he speaks, "and you?"