My Personal Demon

Trust

PLEASE READ: Past chapters have been rewritten with major story changes, if you haven't read them please do, if not this one and future chapters will be confusing.

(They will be moving a lot so I'll be putting the location before the chapter starts to help with confusion.)

-Norway-

It's been a few days since Adin's heat, they'd decided to stay in Norway for few weeks.

Adin's been having nightmares, said it was bad memories and that he still wasn't ready to talk about it. Some times he spaces out or he'll flinch when I touch him. I know he's not ready so I leave it be, stroking his head when he wakes.

Apparently Adin can cook, he made chicken pasta for dinner. "You should cook more often, love." I smile at the flush that spreads to his ears. "I like your cooking, I'm not that good anyway." With a pout I fling a piece of pasta at him, but of course he just stops it in mid air before letting it fall onto his own plate. "Fucking demon magic." He stops for a second before his soft laughter fills the room. "Demon magic huh?" I just continue to pout, crossing my arms when he laughs harder.

It's as we're getting ready for bed that he asks "Are you still upset? Want me to make you feel better with my demon magic?". I just glare, but when he crawls into bed I curl into his side and kiss him good night. I fall asleep to the familiar sound of his humming.

I startle awake to Adin thrashing beside me, sweat on his brow. I shake his shoulder lightly calling his name, hoping to rouse him. It's with a start that he wakes, within moments he on top of me clawed hands around my throat. This has happened before, but today's different. When the dream haze clears and recognition shows in his eyes, instead of letting go, he tightens his grip. He looks desperate.

I let him as his hands slowly squeeze tighter and tighter. "Do you trust me?" In this moment his thumbs pressed into my throat, I'm not sure, trusts never been easy for me, but I want to. "Yes." My voice is scratchy, my throat raw. I wheeze, struggling for breath. It's strange how different being chocked is without pleasure clouding my mind.

I fight the discomfort, sucking in air as well as I can and then he presses just a bit more, I can't breath at all. My thoughts race, I feel trapped, every part of me saying to push him away. But-

But, I don't. He wants to be trusted that much I'm sure of. I can't help but feel like this is a mistake, but I know pushing him away would be a bigger one. Slowly my head starts to spin, I can feel my consciousness slipping away, and I still don't stop him. I bring my hand up to his hip stroking soothing patterns and struggle to smile up at him, even as I feel my eyes bulge.

Then as spots fill my vision and I try again and again to swallow, my throat clicking, his hands are gone. I try to suck in air only for a cough to rack through me and I strain to work moisture into my raw throat. Adin falls to the side his head resting on a pillow.

"Thank you." I just hum in reply, not sure I can trust my voice.

Adin didn't have anymore nightmares after that.