Leaving Me

3.

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~We can't command our love, but we can our actions~
~Arthur Conan Doyle~
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He turns just as I make it to him.

"How could you, Elliot James?!?" I scream, my throat stinging. Tears covering my cheeks.

He steps out of the camera's sight with me in tow.

I glare at him through the tears. He looks past me, his hands stuffed in his pockets. There's no emotion in his eyes, in his face, it's blank. I feel my bottom lip trembling.

I stand on the tips of my toes, throwing my arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. He doesn't move for a few moments. He lets his arms hanging limply at his sides. I don't let go.

I bury my head in his chest in time to feel his arms embrace me.

"Why, Elliot?" I whisper into his shirt, sniffling. "I can't lose you."

He strokes my hair gently, neither of us letting the other go. I haven't stopped crying. There's no reason to. I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block out the pain.

None of it makes sense. How can he just leave?

The breeze stirs the fallen leaves, twirling them around us. I lift my head from his chest, dropping my arms around his waist, my feet unable to tip-toe any longer. I don't let go still. I don't want to let go.

I feel him rest his chin on top of my head.

"C'mon, let's go inside Em."

I nod my head, my voice uncooperative.

The silent walk back is short-lived. Eliot kept his arm around my waist, keeping me close as we walked up the path to my house, it's contemporary design blending in perfectly with the others.

The panel slides open, letting us inside. I slip out from Elliot's grasp as he kicks off his shoes. I trudge down the hallway to the living room, which, is surprisingly clean. Alec must have cleaned it while I was gone.

I collapse onto the end of the couch, relishing in its soothing white texture. I watch Alec as he immerses himself into a video game on the Monitor. Caleb, our older brother, sits next to him holographically. The two are in a heated debate over which game they're going to play. For being nineteen and twenty-four, three and eight years older than me, they seem like they're only ten.

I admire their childish side, it calms me down to watch them as they bickering with one another.

As I watch Alec and Caleb, I feel someone's hand tangle with mine before releasing it. I turn to my right to see Elliot sitting on the floor next to the end of the couch. I send him a weak smile. I watch his lips perk up at the corners before dropping. I turn away from him, facing the monitor.

The screen changes to a new scenario accompanying the now faded argument. I savor the silence knowing that once one of them hits start, the "I'm going to win" argument will begin.

3

2

1

"I'm going to beat you into the ground."

"In you're dreams, short stack."

"Can't do that."

"Do what?"

"Call me short."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm taller."

"Whatever, I'll still be the winner Alec."

I roll my eyes at the two of them, drowning out the rest of their conversation. I glance over at Elliot. He's sitting with his legs crossed as he fiddles with his bracelet. It's made of rope just like Alec's. When a boy turns fifteen, he's given a bracelet made by his mother as a keepsake. It's also a right of passage, sort of a symbol to those around you that you're not an immature teenager anymore.

Elliot's is a thin tan braid with an emerald woven in. When he dies it will be given to person that he chose to pass it along to. In most cases, they are passed onto their children or their parents.

As he stares into his lap whilst he twist his bracelet, I study his features. He has a defined jawline that accents his cheekbones, with his piecing green eyes partly concealed by his soft brown hair. I'm going to miss being able to see his eyes and they're ability to make my heart flutter. I'm going to miss him so much.

I nudge Elliot's shoulder with my elbow. His hands drop into his lap as he looks up at me.

"The boys are no fun when they're not arguing. Want to go sit outside for a little?"

He takes a moment to think, stealing a glance at the panel that leads to the backyard.

"Sure."

In a graceful motion, he pushes himself onto his feet. I slide off the couch and head toward the panel. We both step outside in unison. The smell of nature and afternoon envelops us.

We stand side by side in the center of the yard.

Pit. Pat. Pit. Pat.

Little drops of water start to fall on top of us. We stay there, unmoving, as the rain comes down around us. It's coming down in a little bit less than cascading sheets.

" You once told me," I state, "that the rain isn't tears, but vapor up in the clouds that has condensed."

I turn to face him. He's looking at me with his piercing green eyes as a smile creeps on to his face. I can't help but smile back. He closes the gap between us, wrapping his arms around me.

"I'm going to miss you, Emmy." He whispers into my hair.

I fight back a sob. "Then why are you going?"

"Because it will benefit you later on." His voice is calm and steady.

"How can losing you benefit me, Elliot?" I choke out. "I'll answer. It won't. Please don't do this. If the Lions or the Guard are forcing you to do this, tell me. We can fight back."

"Emmy, I can't fight back and neither can you."

My body seems to enjoy crying seeing as I start to cry once more.

Elliot kisses my forehead before pulling back. His eyes search until they find my gaze, once he has it, he never breaks it.

"I have to go, it's getting close to time."

"Please, Elliot," I pause to sniffle, "please."

"I'm sorry, Em, but I have to." He kisses my forehead one last time before pulling me into our last hug. When we part, he sends me one last smile before turning to head out the gate. I watch him disappear around the corner of the house.

Before I can stop my self I run through the gate.

I shout to him as he walks down the road, the rain pouring down around us.

"I love you, Elliot James!"

He turns around, facing my direction. He gives me a smile while tipping his imaginary hat toward me before he turns back, walking toward his death. Away from me.

"I love you, Elliot." I whisper to him. To the rain.