29. Nolan

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I was still processing what Sebastian had said and I couldn't believe how much I had hurt Nate, I know I had apologized to Nate but after hearing what that guy said now I know I don't deserve Nate. He forgave me instantly without questions, now I know what true love means, that's what Nate is experiencing right now. I know I love him but is my love enough to be with this wonderful person, I feel like I'm selfish. Sebastian was right I don't deserve him at all.

He was here taking care of our kids but what was I doing, I was busy fuckin around, sleeping with different woman like I don't have a care in the world when I knew that I had left a person back in New York who was pregnant with my kids. Sebastian was right I don't deserve Nate at all. He was too precious for me. I ruin everything, nothing goes well in my life.

I looked over at him pushing his food around the plate, he was deep in thoughts and it seems like the whole table was deep in thoughts even the kids aren't eating why I don't know. They were looking at me and Nate with weird looks, I pushed the plate away not feeling like eating.

" Daddy, do you have any picture of our mother" Nate's fork fall from his hands when he had Madi ask as he looked at her shocked. " We want to know how she looked like" she added glancing at both of us and I knew she instantly why she was asking.

" We were wondering wether she looked like Madi or me" Mason added looking at their father. My heart started to beat fast, the way they were looking at him I think they are hiding something.

" Um aahh, I told you I don't have any pic of her" Nate looked at me nervously biting his lips lying to the kids. Was it true what Sebastian said, Nate didn't want the kids to know because he fears that he will lose me.

" You said you loved her. How come you don't have any small picture of her" Madi glared at his father pissed. Now I am sure they heard what Sebastian said " you have uncle Nolan's pictures in your drawer, when he was young but you're telling us that the woman you loved you don't have any pictures" Madi snorted.

" Stop beating around the bush Madi" Mason said " we heard what uncle Sebastian said daddy, I think it's time to tell us the truth" Nathan looked at me with fear in his eyes, but I think today is the day for them to know the truth.

" Um um aah I- um" Nathan stuttered out looking at me with pleading eyes.

" Your not saying anything daddy, we are older enough. Just tell us we can take it" Madi said

" Yeah I know princess but um-" he trailed off bitting his lips as he shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

"I impregnated your father when we were still in highschool" I started swallowing hard, I knew Nate was scared to tell them so I had to, we have to tell them sooner or later " when he told me, I ran away leaving him a lone" I looked at them in the eye to see there reaction, Nate was tapping his leg hard as I passed my hand down to calm him down. This is day is just getting better and better. First it was my father, next Nate's friends now the kids, I wish for it to end and soon.

"Let me get this clear, you lied to us daddy" Madi asked.

" I am so sorry princess"

" No daddy you should have told us the truth instead of lying to us" Madison shouted at his daddy who flinched back shaking in fear. Now I know Nate's fear was losing his children.

" I am sorry, I didn't know where to begin" Nate was tearing up now,his voice shaky.

"You know what is hurting me daddy, it's not that you lied to us about our mother,the fact that you didn't tell us that your the one who gave birth to us" she said in a calm voice.

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