Don't be Happier

Chapter six

After visiting the school they plan on going out for lunch and as much as Louis doesn't want to face him right now, he still goes. Except when they're at the restaurant, Harry isn't there. Inside him, he really feels like asking someone where he's gone off to, but he doesn't feel like he has the right to do it. Not since he hurt him.

Louis says he isn't hungry, Zayn tells him he has to eat because he already looks too thin.

He doesn't really know if he sees it when he looks down at his tummy, though.

Lucky for him, someone else notices the singer's gone missing and asks where he is. Niall tells them he went back to the hotel, had some meeting with his management. Deep inside, Louis wonders if that's actually bullshit and if he decided to avoid him. He doesn't say it out loud though.

Before Louis realises, he orders another beer, craving the drunk feeling. Craving feeling something other than just emptiness, which is the only thing he's known for years.

"What are we doing later?" Luke interrupts his thoughts, leaning back to rest on the chair and drink his pint.

"Drink again?" Ashe offers and Niall laughs, turning to look at his girlfriend and peck her on the lips. "That's my girl, mates," he brags.

The conversation on the table never ends, even when they've already had lunch and Louis' lost count of the pints of beer he's taken. He doesn't really focus on what everyone's talking, though, his mind too busy drifting off to the things he said to Harry, the image of his wet cheeks floating on his head.

That goes until they finally pay the bill and stand up to leave. They decide on drinking again later and Louis wonders if by the end of the weekend he'll have become an alcoholic. He doesn't think about it too much, though, because they're soon reaching the hotel and splitting into their own rooms.

Except for Louis. He doesn't even realise what he's doing before he's asking Liam the number to Harry's room and soon is standing before his door. He takes a few minutes to create the courage to actually knock. He knows the man probably doesn't want to see him, but he's had way too many beers - and maybe a shot or two of tequila with Kath - to actually come to think of that, turn around and go to his own accommodation.

He doesn't knock, though, he just leans back on the wall right beside the door until his bum actually hits the floor. Louis pulls his knees closer to his body and leans his head into them. It doesn't take too long for him to start crying. He blames the alcohol, but he knows it's deeper than that.

His thoughts float away to a younger Harry. A younger Louis and Harry. He recalls the time Harry stayed right outside his house all night. Louis was out with a few friends, with being old enough to go to a bar with an original, authentic ID and order as many drinks as he wanted because he had the document allowing him, after all. He left his house at 4pm, a goodbye party for Louis, who was supposed to leave for university on the day after.

It was 2am when he finally arrived home. He was met with a very sleepy Harry on his doorsteps going through his phone. He remembers actually wondering if it was a hallucination (because he may have smoke a joint or two as well) and considering ignoring it and just going in. Except it wasn't a hallucination and Harry was on his feet the second he realised Louis had gotten home.

"Lou," he said, his voice sounding broken. Enough to break Louis' own heart.

It had been three months after the event. Only three months after he last spoke to Louis. Yet, he felt like it had been years since he last saw him.

"What are you doing here?" Louis asked drunkly, almost missing a step when tried approaching the boy in front of him.

"Are you drunk?" Harry asked and what a ridiculous question.