AFFINITY.

fourteen

Yoongi knew he was hiding. It only took a single glance up at the glass roof of the greenhouse to tell that is was way past dinner, the sunset painting the sky pink and purple above his head. A little longer and it would be completely dark, the small lamps scattered about the greenhouse the only source of light. Yoongi knew the other had called for him, he had heard both Seokjin and Namjoon call his name, but he hadn't come out of hiding, choosing to skip dinner.

Yoongi didn't have it in him to sit through one more silent dinner. He knew it was all on him, and that he was the one making everything awkward, but every time he looked at his friends he was reminded of how easy they were to hurt.

Yoongi cursed, falling back so he was sitting on the moist earth, his shovel falling out of his hands. Sometimes he wished he was born normal, that he didn't have these powers and could have a normal life. Then he wouldn't kill off a whole branch by accident and feel like he couldn't be close to other people. A part of Yoongi knew he was being an idiot, distancing himself from the very few people that loved him despite his many shortcomings, but it was hard. The fear was always there, now more than ever.

Yoongi sighed, putting his head in hands. He was so tired and angry at everything, but mostly himself. He knew he was pushing it. It had been an entire month and he still couldn't touch the others without feeling his heart pound in his chest. He was so tired of dodging the others. If he had to see Seokjin's smile fall as Yoongi went out of his way to avoid touching him, Yoongi might actually die out of pure self-disgust.

Yoongi knew Seokjin had figured out what had happened. Even if Yoongi had done everything to cover up the evidence, the trees talked. And Seokjin was always listening. If there was anyone who loved the Garden more than Yoongi it was Seokjin.

But then again Seokjin could never leave.

Never.

Yoongi felt like hitting something. Seokjin had been trying so hard to talk to him, but Yoongi couldn't listen. He already knew what Seokjin would say, how he would make Yoongi feel like less of a monster and make him return to his usual grumpy self. But Yoongi didn't want to hear it. It was petty lies made up to make Yoongi feel better and forget what he really was.

A monster that could kill in an instant.

Yoongi lifted his head and looked to the little pond in the corner. Without even having to think about it he lifted up some of the water, shaping it into the perfect replica of the Salty Roses in his mind. The process was effortless, the water almost giggling in joy as it shaped itself, glimmering like crystals in the weak light. Yoongi released the water and closed his eyes. He could feel its sadness as he let it fall down with a splash.

Sometimes he wished he could be like his brother, an ordinary elemental witch with an affinity for earth and an accord with something as simple as rock. Then he could have cleared fields, built homes or created small sculptures. He could have stayed in Daegu and have been loved. He might even have been married now, like he father had been when he was Yoongi age. Specialty

The image of Taehyung's big sorrowful eyes flashed through Yoongi's mind, making his heart skip a beat.

Yoongi shook his head and opened his eyes. He had no idea why he was thinking about Taehyung right now. Or, he did know, but he didn't want to think about what Taehyung had told him earlier that day and how the words had left Yoongi stunned, unable to say a single word as Taehyung had walked away.

Yoongi felt like screaming again, or at least like chopping something to pieces. He looked down at the flower path he had been weeding, but there wasn't a single unwanted plant left. The Silver Bells chimed softly as he moved, and while Yoongi didn't want to move he had no more excuses for hiding away in the furthest corner of the greenhouse. Even as annoyed as he were, he couldn't allow himself to be idle. Yoongi might be having an internal crisis, but that didn't stop the garden from growing.