Return My Love || (Hashirama x OC) [ABANDONED]

Chapter 20

Kirai's POV

"Kirai, please, I can see the disturbance in your eyes no matter how hard you attempt to hide it." Hashirama pleaded, even after the battle had ended, he still remained persistent to get the information out of me. My friend, dunce as he is, could be intelligent in reading expressions as well. Though I do not blame him for acting like this, after all, he is the leader, and he will get whatever information he can to outwit the enemy.

When we all retreated, Hashirama had been eyeing me, knowing the fact that I had fallen into a trap. Tobirama, too, has been poking me with questions I dare not to answer. All these battles, despite the plan being a success, were futile. Madara was able to reach me nonetheless, tricking the rest. Which is why Hashirama has been so curious, so annoying for the past few moments, to make me tell him the secrets Madara and I shared.

I always wanted to share everything with Hashirama, but this time, I must lie once again to avoid the true secrets being revealed. All those words that the Uchiha had told me were part of the secrets I dare not tell Hashirama.

Though I am going to admit, everything was effective, except in every effective plan, there is always something that will twist the table. And that obstacle is obviously Madara himself.

Because of this, Hashirama and Tobirama were sullen. Many of their men were killed despite the formation working just a little bit. Things were ruined when Madara took a move on me, which means everything was in vain. Thus, they decided not to do this again and resumed the usual Senju's formation.

Now, even after such a great loss, one part of the battle hasn't ended, which means it all goes down to me. I have information I got from that battle. Indeed, the battle may have ended, but not for me and a certain curious Senju. Well alright, not just one Senju, but two. The leader and the heir themselves.

"Kirai, this is a must. Whatever Madara had done to you when he casted a genjutsu... I beg you to tell me."

I frowned at him, still hesitant to tell the worried clan head. "The genjutsu... Well, the genjutsu did not last long for sure. Not much happened, Hashirama."

His own frown went deeper, "I know better than that, my friend. Madara is a powerful sharingan user, he can change things inexplicably, including time itself."

"And how do you know that?"

He answered right away, "You are not the only victim of his sharingan." Ah, of course. How stupid am I to ask.

"I see..."

It was a way for me to end this conversation, avoiding talking about it, however, he remained persistent. Hashirama sighed, "Listen, Kirai. This is important for me, for you, for everyone else! I am considering everyone's safety, including yours. I may sound desperate, but this is all for safety measures. I need to protect everyone."

Although those words were touching emitting from a true leader, it merely hurts my heart. His reasoning did not go unnoticed by me even though he hides it very well. The reason he's like this as well as the reason he's taking safety measures... is simply because the trust between us is waning.

And everything is all my fault.

Once again, I cannot blame him. My attitude towards him has been cold and distant, leaving him to be suspicious which by no means a problem to me since he is pleading to ensure safety. And because I am not willing to share my secrets to him, he had the right to grow suspicious of me. I am acting strange. Even though I had desired long ago to spill everything, including the story between me and his clansmen, all those hate and resentment, I still do not want him to feel betrayed by his people, therefore, keeping all my feelings hidden. I do not want him to feel distrust of his men just because they abuse me with words.