The Ghost Who Watches Me

chapter 4

After ten minutes of looking for a way in without being noticed we finally result in climbing back in the window. Luke gives me a boost so I can hold onto the roof of the porch before appearing up there to pull me up. I'm starting to ache again and I remind myself to take a painkiller when I'm up there. We do the same method with my window and after scraping my knee and hitting my head on the open window, I make it to the window sill. With one final pull from Luke I topple into my room and take Luke with me. With a grunt I land on his chest.

“Sorry” I begin to get off him when he teleports from under me to next to me. He reaches out his ice-cold hand which I gratefully take and stand up. I try not to wince when I feel the bones in his hands. Odd, I didn’t think ghosts had bones.

“It’s ok, I'm bony all over” he shyly smiles at me and walks back to my bed.

“How did you know I was thinking that?”

“I didn’t, your face tells it all” I'm usually good at showing no emotion, yet this boy can read me like a book.

“Can't you…change your appearance or something?”

“Why? You don’t like the way I look?” he pretends to be overly offended and turns away from me, sort of reminding me of a stroppy toddler.

“No, you look fine. It’s just, you’re not transparent like a ghost, so you could pass for a human. You just look…very ill and very dead. No offence”

“None taken. Anyway, I don’t change my appearance because I can't. I could change clothes if I wanted to but I can't change the way I look. I'm exactly the way I was when I died. The scars, the thinness, I was this way before I died. Dying just made me paler and a little more dead-looking” he pulls his hood down so I can get a better look at his pale face.

“You said you died by slitting your throat…does that mean...”

“Yes” he unzips his hoodie and takes it off.

My gaze goes up and down his chest. His dirty, ripped t-shirt isn’t enough to hide what’s underneath. The t-shirt is so baggy it looks three sizes too big. His arms are so thin it looks as if there is nothing but bone in them. His skin has an almost blue colour to it and I can see his veins in some parts of his arms. My eyes trail up to his neck and I wince when I see the long scar across his neck. I can't help myself, I reach forward and hesitantly touch the scar. It is rough and weird. A tear comes to my eye while I trail my hand across his freezing skin.

“Why are you crying? Am I that bad looking?” he chuckles his heart warming chuckle, trying to cheer me up again, and I giggle. I wipe my eyes and laugh.

“You’re really not bad looking, just something about you makes all my emotions show”

“So you think I'm good looking?” he says after a long pause, “You can be honest with me, I won’t be offended” he tries to do puppy dog eyes but fails and I laugh again.

“Fine, I think you would have been cute before all this happened” I gesture up and down his body. “Now, what do think of me?” I move my hair out of the way and put it behind my ear, showing off my scar for the first time. “There, now you can really see me. He stares and puts his hand up to my face.

“You’re beautiful, Scarlett. How could you ever think you’re not?”

“You’re just saying that…”

“I'm not” he puts his cold arms around me and I hug him back. I've never hugged anyone before.

“Luke, you’re the first person I've ever hugged” I feel I should tell him that, he deserves it.

“Ever?” he pulls back and looks me in the eyes.

“Yep. And you know what? It feels good. It feels natural with you even though I've only known you for about…” I look over at my alarm clock, “five hours” I hug him again, why not?

“Well I've known you longer” he reminds me.

“I know, but so how much do you actually see?” I never thought of how much he actually watches me. What if he's a complete pervert? What if he watches me change? If he does I am getting his ghost ass out of here.

“I know what you’re thinking, and I respect your privacy. I haven't seen anything you don’t want me to. But I have seen how horrible your life is”

“Well I'm glad, for both of those things. It feels nice to have someone to share my pain with” we smile at each other and I snuggle into him when we both lay back on the bed. I stare up at my plain ceiling. My eyelids droop, my body goes floppy and I feel myself being dragged into the world of sleep. Who would have thought this day would end like this? It started like normal, then it went bad, I attacked someone, I nearly killed them, I got suspended, my parents went crazy and my mum beat me until I felt like I was going to die. Yet, after all that, I'm sitting here on my bed in the arms of a ghost that has been watching me for most of my life. And I've never felt safer.