The Night Rider

Chapter 71

I have lost track of time at the moment, whether it is the middle of the day or still morning. The number of servants in the corridor tells me that it is not too early. The guards in their uniforms seem to have been awake for hours. Since it appears to be later in the day, perhaps I should have put on a little more clothing. In only my underwear and dressing gown, which turns out to be my new daily outfit, I walk through the corridors. Without a destination, I let my feet slide across the floor.

'Hey Rafiki'. I look up as soon as I walk past the dining room. My parents, Chea, Novak and Celeste are sitting at the table. I expected to see breakfast, but all I see are papers. Why they don't use the meeting room is beyond me. For a moment I doubt if I want to walk into the room, then I think to myself that I don't know what that would mean. I still feel confused. I hardly dare to face Noa's parents, I can't utter a sensible word and I feel uncomfortable.
I decide to walk on without saying anything.

I pull the dressing gown tighter around me and feel the eyes of the guards on my skin. The black lines are not completely concealed, nor is my underwear. Behind me I hear the familiar sound of Celeste's heels. Automatically I begin to quicken my pace, hoping she'll turn around and leave me alone. 'Rafiki, wait'. The pace of her heels quickens so I know I've lost. Still I try to walk faster but that too is in vain.

Celeste's hand ends up on my shoulder and holds me still. 'What's the matter?'. In a strange way Celeste's voice always seems to calm me down. She walks around me until she can look into my eyes. I hadn't thought of anything I could say, now I'm even more at a loss for words. Celeste seems to notice. 'Let's go to my office'. I nod slowly before the woman starts pulling me along. I let her lead me to the door.

She opens the door and waits patiently for me to walk in. Automatically, I walk to the couch that is in the corner of the room. I lower myself on it and fold my hands and legs together. I don't notice Celeste walking back and forth through the room, so much so that I sink back into my own thoughts. As soon as a cup of tea is pushed into my hands I understand why she's pacing back and forth. She takes a seat in the chair opposite me. 'Tell me'. I appreciate Celeste's patience with me. I haven't always been easy with her and yet she's always the one who seems to want to listen to me quietly.

Her patience doesn't take away from the fact that I'm still at a loss for words. 'I-I...Uuhm', is all I get out. I clasp the cup of tea between my hands. 'You've been intimate with Noa'. My eyes widen, in surprise I look at the woman in front of me with the lopsided grin on her lips. 'How do you know?', I say quietly. 'Don't forget that I am attached to you. Before you panic now, I didn't feel the same way you did. All I felt was a sense of an emptiness filled in by your blood bond. A feeling I recognised from me and Novak at the time'.

I can sink to the floor. The only thing I can think of to do now is to take a sip of my tea. 'Why are you so upset about that?' I blow my breath out through my nose and try to think of an answer. I honestly don't know what upset me. It felt like I was being beaten by reality. 'I realised when I woke up that...' I can't get the words out of my mouth, the truth hurts. 'That it's the last time for now,' she complements me. I nod slowly.

'Raf, listen to me. It may not seem like it, it may not feel like it, but before you know it you'll be back. In a way, losing your memories is also something pleasant. You can't long for something you don't know. You get a second chance and you have to take it. Think of life as a game. You start again from the beginning and slowly make progress, learn more and get your cards. Sometimes you make a stupid move or throw the wrong card. The next time, you won't make that move again and you'll make another step forward'.

I smile slightly at her words. Somehow I know that I will remember those words, no matter what they say. I know that I will slowly get things back. On the one hand, the thought frightens me, on the other it is reassuring. 'Thanks,' I mumble and take a sip of my tea. 'No problem Raf. Enjoy these last few days, they'll be gone before you know it'. Celeste gets up from her chair and walks to her desk. With my eyes I follow every move she makes. I think of something as soon as I see her open a drawer. 'Will you promise me something?' I put the cup on the little table next to the sofa. Celeste looks up with a paper in her hand. 'Sure,' she replies.

'Make sure Noa gets on with his life. Keep an eye on him'. These words hurt to utter but I mean them, I want him to be happy. 'Sure, promise'. I nod approvingly and want to get up. 'I have two more questions for you'. I was actually planning on going back to my room but stay put and nod. 'The first one is more of a request, don't dwell on it too much once you get a single memory back. Enjoy your life there, we'll make sure everything keeps running here'.

I sigh deeply and nod. The difficult thing is I don't know what to prepare for. 'The other thing is, I want you to sign this paper. In this form you appoint Chea as your successor. In the small print it says that upon your return you will regain the throne. We need this to keep the dawn at bay'. Celeste walks towards me in slow steps. She holds out the paper with a pen to me. I put my fingers around the sheet of paper and nod. I hadn't thought of this myself but now that I hear it, it sounds like a very good solution. 'Your mother has arranged it'.