✓ROYALTY UNDERCOVER───𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐁𝐘𝐍 𝐀𝐔

100k special

— 2 months after the graduation —

daniel is miserable, and there is nothing he can do about it, or well, at least there is nothing that he wants to do about it. he deserves it. after what he did to everyone at school — after what he did to his friends, corbyn especially, he deserves it, every single moment of his misery is deserved.

the inability to sleep, the anger — the numbness, and the subtle ache in his chest, his heart. every single little ounce of misery in him. it's deserved. even though his father, claus and every other person that attended him in any way tell him the opposite. daniel can't help but blame himself. his friends must be hurting as well, perhaps even worse than daniel. they don't deserve that, it was him who had been the liar — him who had brought the pain to them. so it would only have been fair if he was the only one affected by it.

the guilt is slowly eating him up, not just the guilt from hurting them, there's something that he feels even more guilty about.— the fact that he would do it all over again. if he could go back in time to before his senior year, he'd still make the same decision. he'd still choose to go a public school, and he'd still decide to get close to the same people — he'd still decide to kiss corbyn, to fall in love with him, there's nothing he would have done differently. and that guilt was killing him more.

daniel is selfish. he knows that. but still he really can't seem to regret anything. because, regretting it would mean regretting corbyn — and there's no way he'd ever be able to regret anything related to corbyn.

"how long are you gonna lie there? you're starting to remind me of a corpse, you know," a soft voice asked from the door, as she let herself walk into the room and sit down on the edge of the prince's bed. "i can't believe my parents want me to marry such a loser," she joked, smiling as she watched daniel move so that he could sit up on the bed, the blanket he was wearing sliding down slightly to reveal his pale shoulders and collarbones that seemed to miss the sun fat more than the prince itself. it was as if the life had been sucked out of the boy.

"unfortunately, it seems that you're stuck with me, at least for now." he muttered softly as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her down with him. "no, daniel! you're going to get out of your bed, take a shower and then we're going outside and into the garden, okay?" she said sternly. daniel just sighed, but he did as she said. he had to. he knew that he had to.

"okay, bella. i'll come to your room in 30 minutes or so, is that okay?" she nodded, a bright smile on her face. and for a second daniel found himself mirroring it. he was truly thankful for bella, even though it annoyed him that she was always forcing to get up and out. but he knew that she did it for him — to keep him moving, to keep him sane. she was the only one who seemed to care about his mental health, or well, she's at least the only who had tried to help him better it.

and as he stood in the shower, he felt himself shivering no matter how hot water was — he swayed a bit, dizzy from the lack of eating, and movement. at one point he even had to place his arms against the walls to prevent himself from falling over. he had to get his shit together — soon, or it'd be too late. a part of him feared that it was already starting to be too late.

he tried to force a smile on his face as he knocked on his best friend's door. one he knew she'd return as soon as he opened the door.

she did. every time, no matter how exhausted she was.

the two of them didn't say much the first few minutes as they calmly walked through the garden together, just enjoying the presence of the other person — of their surroundings.

"do you really love him that much?" love. not like. daniel's breath got caught in his throat. he knew that she knew, they had talked about corbyn and the others on multiple occasions, but still she had never asked him that question — not as directly. never like this.

"yes. i did — i do. i don't know when, or how — even why, i just know that i don't think i'll ever be able to move on from him, it feels as if a part of him has been sown in the my heart for eternity, without my permission, and there's absolutely nothing i can do about it. i wish i could forget him though, — wait no, i don't want to forget him, i just want to un-love him. i'm supposed to be the future king you know? there's expectations of me, and those expectations do not involve me falling in love with a guy, i don't know how the public would take it, but i'm guessing that it wouldn't be in a very good way. corbyn doesn't deserve to go through any of that — but he doesn't deserve to be my eternal secret either. you don't either, none of you deserve any of that." daniel whispered ever so softly as glossy tears started to slowly slide down his cheeks.

"you don't deserve it either, daniel. your soul is so beautiful, and your heart is made of pure gold. you deserve to be free and happy to do what you want for once — free of the public's expectations." daniel smiled sadly as he wrapped her arms around her shoulder, pulling her into him. he knew she wanted the best for him — that she believed in a better world. he didn't. he had lost far too much faith in humanity to believe in the better of humans.

"what about you, did you leave someone behind in france?" he asked — just then realizing that she had never told him about anyone from back home, and neither had he asked. "there was someone," she said after a minute or two, and for the first time since she had come daniel watched her face go dark, ridden of all emotions.

"and?" he asked, unsure of whether she wanted to talk about it, or glaze it over.

"there's not much to say, i loved him — he loved someone else, there's not much i can do about it. if she makes him happier than i do, then i don't want to stand in the way of that." daniel felt his heart break for her, ever so silently. — and for once he saw the girl behind the walls. he saw past the never ending smiles, and the fight to keep him over the water, and realized that she was not only doing this for him, she was doing it for the both of them.

"we're both a bit pathetic aren't we?" he just asked, unsure of what else to say. the other laughed. "in the best way possible," she added. daniel smiled at that. they were messed up — but at least they could be messed up together, each of them fighting to find ways to mend their own heart.

and it was at that moment he promised himself to be there for her as much as she was there for him. because whether he liked it or not, they were one and the same — and perhaps, even though he didn't realize it back then, they were also each others' salvation.

AUTHORS NOTE !

it felt weird to write on this story again, but at the same time, it was comfortably nostalgic. i'm not sure i like this little special very much — but i hope you do. <3

thank you for 100k and the neverending support, i love you all so much. remember to stay safe, and healthy.