Mafia's tomorrow

29-Focus

"Seemed like a little love note there. Just a little less dirty."

"I'd say completely platonic".

"That isn't how it is supposed to be between fiancés, baby."

Our not-so-professional talk which started the moment I opened the door came to an end with my scowl. To which he just smirked.

And that moment I realised that it was so easy with him now.

Since the moment I came to terms with my feelings. I was at ease with him. And I have no idea why.

I opened the door wider to let him in and moved towards my devised plan. On his way in he shut the door.

At this moment I just want to kiss him, pull him on the bed and do other things. I myself am surprised.

Anyway..Focus.

We go to the board with pins and photographs. My list of demands had a computer and a printer. I couldn't use mine, too risky to show it to our mafia boss. If he knows that I have one, he might order one of his geniuses to hack into and what not.

God, I am paranoid. Well, whatever.

Better safe than sorry.

My plan is well devised and to be brought as soon as possible into motion. Jax listens carefully and attends to my each word. He looks so genuine in trying to help me and I feel bad.

I start to feel guilty when he whole-heartedly agrees to his part. I feel as if I am cheating on him. I am supposed to kill him and here he is helping me.

I push those feelings aside and my gut feeling telling me to tell him the truth. But I cannot risk the plan. I cannot risk it and I cannot risk him.

He is one of the few good things to ever happen to me.

And I am selfish. Selfish enough to risk it. To delay it, just a little longer.

Because a part of me knows, it will all come to an end. No matter how hard I try.

And I will fight anything to not let that happen.

After telling him everything, I am satisfied. So he seems.

And I know that he trusts me. And I know that by the way he doesn't question my motives. His eyes are...proud. And I feel complete. As if I have achieved everything for that moment. And I am happy.

I am happy enough, to be this daring as I ask him.

"Have a dinner with me." His eyes light up. Those eyes are challenging me to make a move. And I am more than willing to.

"As what? Acquaintances?". He stands up.

"If that is what you want. Though I'd prefer something else." I say taking a step forward.

"Like what?" he says coming close to me. Inches apart.

His eyes are on my lips. And with my impromptu plan, I thought we'd be doing this after the dinner.

But, none of cares.

"Someone who can do this." With that I place my lips on his.

I have zero experience. But do have an idea. I believed in being aware about this activity for if it ever encountered and it served right.

Jax is hesitant regarding it. And keeps his mouth on mine. Seems like I am taking the lead.

I don't think much, with what I let my instincts take the lead, and run my tongue on his bottom lip. He sucks in air.

My body is on fire. And where his hands are on my waist, I follow their lead and move closer to him, to the point where my body and his are touching.

My hands move to his neck and he snaps. He opens his mouth and thrusts his tongue into mine. With this change I retract my tongue while he charges.

His lips move against mine and his tongue is playing with mine. Moving it to the direction it pleases. And I am more than happy to oblige.

He bite my lip and makes space for us to breathe. I greedily take in air. We both are panting.

I open my eyes and notice his are still closed and then join our foreheads and whisper.

"I like you too, Jax Carson."