Four Weeks In Cedar Bay

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

When Amy arrived at the hospital, she was surprised to receive a warm welcome from the staff, as opposed to the last time she tried to visit Connie and they refused her.  Walking into Connie’s room was daunting, machines were still monitoring her vitals, she was still hooked up to fluids and she was not awake.  The scene looked like the equipment was still keeping her alive.  The nurse that showed Amy to Connie’s room began to explain, keeping Connie closely monitored was still in place for the next few days due to the coma.  Once they are happy with Connie’s progress, they would begin to remove the monitors and the drip.  Amy was unfamiliar with seeing anyone in a hospital.  She felt frightened for her friend, but she tried to keep her emotions in check.  It was difficult to see Connie like this.  There really wasn’t anything Amy could do for her, but she hoped her presents would be enough to lift her spirits.

Roy was into his second day without Amy.  He hadn’t heard from her since she’d left on the train, but he hadn’t called or messaged her either, giving her time to be with her friend.  The distance between them was difficult, all Roy could do was try and keep busy at the Inn.  There were only five families left to check out the following day, so between meals and cleaning rooms, Roy had been flat out since Amy left for the city.  He was already considering driving the four hours to find Amy once the last of the festival guests left.  He had even spoken to his Aunt about taking a few days to go into the city.  He wanted to be there for Amy, help out wherever he could.  The strong urge he felt to be someone Amy could lean on was undeniable. 

Amy had spent the last two days by Connie’s side.  Her friend was making great progress and this was the day she would be moved out of the intensive care unit.  Connie’s daughter, Rose, had been in touch with the staff at the hospital daily and she had finally managed to arrange someone to look after her children and would be arriving later in the night.  Rose had even spoken to Amy over the phone a number of times, they hadn’t met as yet, but they were already getting along like they’d known each other for years.  Rose was very much like her mother Connie, they both had the same friendly disposition, they both talked in the same caring manner, without actually seeing Rose, Amy swore they could pass as twins, not mother and daughter.  In almost every way, they were very much the same.  Amy developed an instant connection with Rose.  Perhaps Amy was grasping at something that wasn’t there, but she had a sense of feeling like she’d found a sister in Rose.  Not ever having a family, Amy felt humbled by both Connie and Rose, they made her feel like she belonged.

Amy was a little disheartened she hadn’t heard from Roy so she tried to occupy her time best she could.  There was children’s ward nearby and Amy had begun volunteering her time to read and play games with the young patients between her time spent with Connie.  Whenever Amy was around the children, they inspired her with their bravery and resilience.  Amy was learning a lot by spending time around such strength of people so young.  She wished she had their abilities to look at the world the way they did.  But with each moment spent in the children’s ward, Amy felt herself changing and connecting to their resilience, drawing her own strength from theirs.  She was inspired by the smallest of acts, weather it be a tiny smile, a shared giggle with a newfound friend, or taking bad news and seeing the brighter side of life.  Being grateful for each day, every moment, every breath, life was a blessing and each following day was only as good as you wanted it to be.  Amy found a peace she never expected.  She was starting to rethink so many aspects of her own life, and one thing she decided to change was her work.  She no longer wanted to help the wealthy remain wealthy or exploit the working-class, as big corporations tended to do, she wanted to do something positive with her life.

Amy had started looking into what it would take for her to become an Early Childhood Educator.  She was feeling so strongly, this was what she was born to do.  Amy found it so easy to connect and communicate with the children, even the staff were impressed and were already begging Amy to stay on as a permanent volunteer.  The feeling of being wanted and needed was so unusual for Amy, her heart felt like it was going to explode with gratitude.  A tiny part of Amy began to dare think what it might be like for her to one day become a mother herself.  She wasn’t convinced she’d be a good mum, but she did know one thing, if she ever had a son or a daughter of her own, she would love them unconditionally and do her best to give them the world.  Amy never would have believed, spending two days with children could have such a profound effect on her entire way of thinking and how she now wanted to choose to live her life.  Things were going to change for Amy and she was excited, not only looking forward to a meaningful future but a future she could be proud of.

As the last of the guests checked out, Roy prepared himself for the long list of tasks needing to be completed before he headed for the city.  He knew he wasn’t going to get there today, but he was determined to be there by lunch time the following day.  Passing by Amy’s room, he had to stop himself from going in each time.  The reminder she wasn’t there was eating away at him.  Forcing himself to refocus all the time was becoming exhausting, he felt like he was accomplishing so little.  Far too many times, he was too tempted to quit and just take off, but he’d think of his Aunt and keep pushing through his duties to the Inn.  When he was finally done, he took a moment to go into Amy’s room.  Hoping beyond hope she’d be back at some point, he decided to strip her bed and remake it with freshly laundered sheets and pillow slips.  The room still lingered with Amy’s intoxicating scent; her perfume hung in the air like a permanent reminder of the woman who occupied the room only days ago.  This reminder brought back a flood of memories for Roy, like fixing the compression wrap to Amy’s ankle, carrying her to the bathroom when she was struggling through her pain and that first kiss.  He was missing everything about Amy, but the memory of kissing her was burned into his brain.

Amy left Rose with Connie as she headed to the children’s ward for story time in the common room.  A few of the young patients had come and gone, but there were five that remained each day.  They were now familiar with Amy’s story time and would eagerly await her arrival.  Word was spreading via the five regular children to anyone new on the ward and each day, the number of children waiting to hear Amy’s next story was growing.  The first time the little crowd grew, almost doubling in number, Amy felt somewhat overwhelmed.  But the chatter, laughter and questions that flowed after the reading helped Amy to relax and connect with the children who all were genuinely interested in not just the story, but so many other random subjects.  Amy certainly didn’t hold a wealth of knowledge, but the children made it so easy to consider all sides to any line of conversation that no one felt left out, nor did anyone feel less knowledgeable than the next person.

It was the fourth day since Amy had left Cedar Bay and even though she was making small changes in her life, changes she was excited for, she was beginning to feel a little lonely when she went home to her very quiet and very empty apartment.  She would start to wonder what Roy was doing, how Ruth was managing without Kate at the café and how Lorna was coping with doing the work of two waitresses.  No doubt by now, Clara would be grateful the festival guests were all gone and she’d have a moment to herself again.  Preparing for the Christmas vacationers would be next and from what Amy had seen on the Inn’s web page, Clara would be busy soon organizing all the activities she put on each year for her guests.  She ran baking classes, baking contests, gingerbread house building and each year a Snow Santa Village would come to life at the front of the Inn, all put together by the guests, with each person adding to the village over a two-week period.  Amy had a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach, like she was home sick. 

After a long soak in a bath and with a head filled with memories of Cedar Bay, and the people she was starting to really miss, Amy decided to go to bed early.  She tried to read her book but she was far too distracted and lost in her thoughts.  Reaching for her phone, she even thought about calling Roy, but she stopped herself saying, ‘If he wanted to talk to you, he would have called or messaged you by now.  If you call him, you just look desperate and needy.  You don’t even know if you will ever see him again and he’s probably forgotten all about you by now’.  Putting her phone on the nightstand and turning out the side lamp, she tried to shut her brain down and hoped sleep would come.

Timing couldn’t have been worse.  After spending over an hour trying to get to sleep, Amy’s eyelids had grown heavy at the same time a message came into her phone.  Worried about Connie, Amy picked up the phone immediately to check the notification.  Rubbing her eyes in disbelief, Amy stared at her phone.  ‘It couldn’t be! You must be dreaming’.  Putting her phone down next to her, she sat up and rubbed her eyes again.  Picking the phone back up and unlocking it, Amy clicked on the notification.  It was a message from Roy.

Hello Amy.  Sorry I haven’t been in touch, I thought it best to give you some time to focus on Connie.  The Inn has kept me busy these past few days, the last of the guests checked out today and things are quiet again, for now.  How have you been?  How’s Connie?  I’ve been thinking about you.  I miss you Amy.

Amy really didn’t think she would hear from Roy again.  But as she read the end of the message, her heart gave an unexpected flutter.  Every single memory of Roy came rushing back, the good and the bad.  She had a sudden urge to want to be in his arms, feeling him hold her tight like he’d never let go.  Taking a moment to think about a response to Roy, she turned on the side lamp and slowly began to type.

Roy, it’s nice to hear from you.  I’ve been well and Connie has been moved out of the intensive care unit, she may even get to leave the hospital soon.  I’ve been volunteering at the Children’s ward at Saint Barts while visiting Connie, the children are the sweetest and so unbelievably resilient, it’s been inspiring!  I’ve been thinking of you and everyone else in Cedar Bay. 

A few times Amy had deleted what she typed, she wasn’t really sure what to say and what not to say.  While some things in her life she was absolutely and unequivocally sure of these days, there were still things like Roy she had doubts about.  Allowing herself to trust someone again was going to take quite some time.  While she was in Cedar Bay and had gotten to know the real Roy underneath his gruff exterior, she thought she’d finally been able to trust again, have faith in someone, but the longer she was away from Roy, the more she was convincing herself she was wrong.  Questioning now, ‘Why did Roy choose this night to message her?  Was he bored?  Were things that quiet at the Inn and he was just that desperate for a conversation with anyone?’  The more Amy questioned the message, the more she didn’t like her line of thinking.  It wasn’t long and her phone chimed the arrival of another message.

That’s good to hear Connie is on the mend.  Volunteering?  Sounds like you’ve been busy.  It’s nice to hear from you and know you’re keeping well.  I’ve got an early morning tomorrow.  I’ll talk to you soon.  Be well Amy.

‘So that’s that then’, Amy thought.  Her heart felt like a piece of it broke off.  She felt a devastation drag her down, but she swore she wouldn’t cry.  Trying desperately to think of anything other than Roy to attempt to get some sleep was now impossible.  The next six hours were excruciating.  Amy couldn’t sleep, nor could she erase Roy from her thoughts no matter how hard she tried.  By three in the morning, Amy had got up out of bed and spent an hour on her treadmill.  Not even pushing herself to exhaustion could change how wide awake she was.  Running a warm bath, adding a calming lavender bath bomb and soaking for as long as she could stand it, Amy was still hopeful she’d find herself drifting off to sleep again. 

At five in the morning, fresh and relaxed from her lavender bath, Amy wrapped herself back into her bed, closed her eyes and only concentrated on the softness of the blankets, cradling her pillow and surprisingly, after only a few short minutes, she finally fell asleep.  When Amy woke from what felt like a short nap she checked the time.  Expecting to see the time telling her it was maybe seven, she was gob smacked when she saw it was after nine!  A quick shower, a likely poor choice of clothing and fifteen minutes later, Amy was out the door and heading back to the hospital.  It wasn’t as though she had any obligations like getting to work on time, but she didn’t want to let the children down at the hospital.  Her first story time of the day was scheduled for ten o’clock.  Visualizing the disappointed faces of the children was almost enough to finish her off after the somber mood she’d found herself in after reading Roy’s last message.

With only enough time to quickly say good morning to Connie and Rose, Amy headed straight down to the children’s ward.  Not having any extra time to pick out the mornings reading, Amy improvised.  When she entered the common room, there were her five regulars ready and waiting for Amy, along with another ten children scattered around the tables and relaxing on the floor cushions on a good-sized matted area.  Fifteen children was a record number for Amy, she wasn’t prepared for so many faces staring up at her with expectation in their eyes.  She began to think, ‘Gee, these kids are really overselling the whole story time thing.  You can’t afford to disappoint them Amy!’.  Today, she was going to let the children decide which book she would be reading, ‘Keep the crowd happy’, she thought.

They all agreed on a Harry Potter style of book which had them all excited.  Once Amy began to read, they all became quiet and hung on every word Amy spoke as she became animated in her telling of the story.  The book was filled with drama, excitement, a little suspense and humor which even made Amy laugh.  When the book was finished Amy was approached by three children wanting to ask a laundry list of questions about the main characters.  Amy did her best to interpret what she thought the writer was striving for in each character.  She must have been convincing enough because all three children agreed with her one hundred percent.  Most of the children came up to Amy and thanked her for the story and asked when she’d be back to read again.  She felt like what she was doing at the hospital for the children really did mean something and it made Amy feel extraordinary. 

As Amy sat in the little chair, surrounded by quizzical little people, getting taps on the shoulder here and there as another little girl, or boy wanted her attention, she felt a tap on her back.  Noticing all the children looking up, Amy turned but all she saw was a pair of legs in denim jeans.  Realising this was not a child trying to get her attention, she looked up.  Amy leapt up from the chair and almost burst into tears as she wrapped her arms around the neck of the man who had captured not only the children’s attention, but now Amy’s as well.  Amy was speechless and she felt tears begin to well in her eyes.  “I’ve missed you”, Roy said, “You have no idea how hard it was to not say something to you last night”. 

Amy had no words, she just held onto Roy as if he was life itself and if she let go, life would end and he would disappear.  Feeling as though she was dreaming, Amy gave a harder squeeze with her hug to which Roy responded with a tighter hold.  “It’s okay.  I’m here to stay for a while, I’m not going anywhere”, Roy said as he could feel the beginnings of light sobbing coming from Amy.  He wanted to kiss her beautiful soft lips, but being around so many children, he considered that might be inappropriate, so he chose to keep holding Amy for as long as she needed him to.