BTS Oneshots [Requests Open]

Secret Love Song (Part I)

[Reader x Namjoon]

"Another Martini, please." I asked the bartender, my eyes not leaving him once.

When yet another woman caressed his arm, I bit my lip so hard that only the taste of blood prompted me to release. "Why can't we be like that?" I said to myself, wiping a stray tear off and drinking the martini like a shot. "Another one." I demanded and Eun-woo gave me a concerned look, but complied.

***

I walked out of the building and the chilly, autumn air caressed my face. November was just around the corner and along with it came the two years anniversary of the day I packed my bags and got on a plane to Seoul, leaving my hometown behind. It was my dream to travel the world while teaching English, but had someone told me that only one year in I'd get to work for Bighit Entertainment, I would have scoffed a "yeah sure" and called it a day. Yet there I was, staring at the humongous glass building, about to go in for another lesson, far from the small language school that I had started in.

"Good morning," I greeted, picking up my badge from the security guard who responded with a kind smile, as always.

I scanned it quickly and opened the gate when the green light lit up and I heard the familiar beep granting me access. I draped the piece of plastic proudly around my neck – it was company policy that our badges had to always be on display - then I glanced at my watch to notice that I was about to be late for my first lesson with a new group of students. When I saw the elevator doors closing, I decided to make a run for it and despite stumbling on my high heels right in front of the doors and looking stupid, I had made it just in time to slide my arm in... which counted as a victory in my book.

I smiled and rearranged my hair as I got on, and noticed the button for my floor was already lit up. So, I shuffled over to the side and slowly made my way to the back as people kept getting off, until I was one of the only people left.

"Oh my God!" I somehow managed to scream internally when I glanced over casually and my eyes fell on Kim Namjoon. "Stop staring, stop staring," had to have turned into my daily affirmation, because I kept repeating it a million times an hour while my eyes – the size of pots – kept glancing over at him.

When the elevator came to a halt, he waited for me to get off first, then followed. Naturally, knowing that he could have been looking at my back, I tried to sit as straight as possible and stick my ass out, which caused me to lose my balance and do the little "new-born baby calf" dance... you know, the one where you're about to break your ankles in your high heels, but you'll be damned if you'd let yourself go down that easily, so you just stand there, wobbling like one of those car dealership inflatable men until you either regain balance of fall down for good.

Before I got to find out which one it would be that day, I felt a strong hand grab my arm and pull me back on my feet.

"Are you ok?" I'd lie if I said I didn't scream inside when I heard that sexy voice so close to my ear. I didn't even dare turn around – mostly because I was too embarrassed, but also because I had rarely been in the presence of such sexiness up close and had no idea how my body would react to that, physically. Anyways, pretty sure something like the female version of a boner.

"Ah, yes, thank you," I replied a bit way too casually, "had I known walking in high heels would be one of my job requirements, I would have taken my teenage years more seriously." He laughed slightly in response and I took a deep, meditative breath. "Breathe and believe. Heels can smell fear." I told myself out loud, put on a stern face and pointed forward with my arm, as if to show my brain the direction, that time actually focused on walking properly rather than the look of my ass.

***

Well, something I had done worked, because the hot mess that was chugging Martinis at the bar was officially – though not publicly – his girlfriend. I closed my eyes for a second and despite the room spinning slowly, I remembered the first day he'd come into my class. He had walked in halfway through my lesson and I told him that if he was there to steal my job, he had to at least be punctual.

"Joke aside, if you would like to attend my class, you will have to join at the same time as the others." Jimin and Yoongi nudged each other and giggled at their leader getting scolded, but one look was enough to remind them that they were in my class. Everything went quiet for a moment and I would later find out that Namjoon was there to witness the person who managed to not only keep the members of BTS quiet, but also get them interested in learning English. He was tired of hearing about it at practice and had to see it for himself. He'd been trying to teach them for years, yet there they were, all staring at the Smart Board as if hypnotized.

"When you finally cracked and smiled after that, I understood immediately... because I was under your spell too." He told me when he asked me on our first date. It took him a few months of dating to admit that it had been the ass thing that did the trick – it might have been to finally get me to shut up about it, but I take the validation that I can get.

We had our first date in one of the meeting rooms at the firm... and lots of the others after that. He'd gotten us coffees and some macaroons and the fact that we could never go public with it was one of the first things he ever said. But when Namjoon looks at you – and I mean really looks at you – you simply can't imagine what that is actually going to feel like long-term... He could have asked me to give him one of my kidneys and I would have said yes, basically for the same reason: that damn look in his eyes and the fact that I wouldn't have been able to tell how that would affect me long-term.

"At least I didn't give him one of my kidneys." I thought to myself, sniffling and sipping slowly on my new drink. When he looked at me from the corner of his eye, I frowned and turned around on my bar stool.

"Rough night?" Eun-woo asked compassionately and I began ugly-crying.

"I don't understand why I can't tell you. You'd think I'm crazy anyways." I replied in-between sobs.

"Fair enough. I have no idea what you're talking about and I already do think that." He laughed and I did too. When I raised my hand, he pinned it back down on the bar and patted it gently. "You should go dance a little before I get you anything else. Sweat a few of these off," he added, pointing to all the empty Martini glasses that he had purposely left empty in front of me to prove that I had a drinking problem.

"Ok, but can I have the usual before I go?" I asked and he nodded, placing a soft kiss on my forehead. I almost fell off my stool when I turned around and met Namjoon, who gave me a disapproving look and despite the less-than-friendly glare, my heart still skipped a beat. I wanted to be in his presence so bad, that I would have taken anything. I gave him a questioning look in return, but proceeded to make my way towards the dance floor before our interaction became long enough to be noticed. His hand reached for me instinctively, trying to grab my arm, but he caught himself in time so instead he just turned to the bar.

Being a foreign woman in a Korean club was sure to garner some attention and being a good dancer certainly helped as well. Did you know dancing is proved to relieve stress and anxiety? I began moving my hips slowly, trying to get into a rhythm, but my mind was elsewhere. Despite the equally drunk men trying to get me to dance for them, my eyes never left Namjoon. Some Spanish song was blaring through the speakers and the dancefloor had gotten more animated, so I closed my eyes and let the music carry me away. I really needed another Martini and I knew Eun-woo well enough to know that I wouldn't get it unless I got a bit of a workout before – plus as long as my eyes were opened, they'd keep wandering back to him and it was starting to get creepy.

I'd joined a group of girls that were dancing together, hoping their energy was contagious and they welcomed me with open arms, cheering and hyping me up, making me want to do the same for them. It wasn't long before a group of guys approached them – I say them because I was there for one person only – and we mingled, constantly and randomly exchanging partners. I remember turning around at some point, to see this handsome Korean guy looking down at me with this flirty spark in his eyes as This is what you came for by Rihanna played in the background and a wave of loneliness washed over me. I let him get closer than I normally would have and touched his body, not in any sexual way, just to feel like I wasn't all alone.