These Paths We Tread (Autobot x OC)

XIV. See You Soon

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If there was one thing Catherine was good at, it was keeping her emotions in check so she could go about things, which was a very good thing considering her occupation.

She did fairly well the first day. It wasn’t hard for her to deny the existence of what happened the previous night. It was similar to plugging her fingers into her ears and going “la la la” when not wanting to listen to someone, only it was in her head and against her memories. Of course, instead of “la la la”, it was more so stating that it didn’t happen and she was most certainly not thinking about a certain someone that she didn’t want to think about because of certain events she did not want to remember.

It started first with waking up and blocking the memories that were ready to drown her with an insanely strong torrent. It became a little more difficult as she started working out, which was when she normally let her thoughts wander around, but she found focusing on the exercises worked well enough. Things got easier when she met up with her team and they distracted her with random rambles that she could wrap her mind around. Sometimes the night before would start to touch at her consciousness; testing the strength of her well-built dam, but she fought it back.

She worried the others might catch on and say something—might cause a small break in the foundations, but as the day wearied on, they said nothing. She was just glad they didn’t catch her in the few instances when she made a weird face or did some odd gesture to help her forget. She had no doubt they would have started to pry, and even if they hadn’t, she knew without a doubt Lennox would have after they were done. There was no way his fatherly personality would allow it to go by without question, especially when she was basically his adopted kid.

She faltered a little during the simulation training, but only because she had to force back a memory just as an “explosion” went off and debris almost hit her. Thankfully, she managed to dodge, although she completely fell on her ass and received some concerned “what-the-hell-were-you-doing” looks. Luckily, her teammates had all had their share of “off days”, so they didn’t question her apparent lack of focus. They did note she was a little quiet and withdrawn compared to usual, although it was with casual, humorous banter that she shrugged off with similar demeanor.

The obstacle course fared better for her as it required a bit more focus to make sure she didn’t trip and smack her face into the ground or anything else. Of course, everything after that was like a free game hunting season for those thoughts she so desperately wanted to keep back. It was almost insane how quickly they began to ram and surge against her barriers on her way back to the Autobot’s wing. Once she managed to cross the chasm between the sides, they settled down, but only a little. She still needed a distraction. Anything would do, and she meant anything. She would even take those two damned, annoying poser Twins if it would just keep her mind off those even more damned thoughts!

However, life could not be so kind or easy, and it turned out that it was only when she didn’t want to find them that the Twins were nowhere to be found. To make matters worse, Sideswipe had agreed to swap duty schedules with someone else, so he would be busy all night, and she had no idea where Jazz was—she prayed he would randomly pop up like a ninja. The other Autobots she didn’t know well enough and they seemed to understand it was better to avoid her right now or at least not talk to her.

She ultimately decided that should at least try to do something productive as well as distracting, and for that she headed to the Medbay. Ratchet and Jolt were there as always, along with her three creations. Ever since Steeljaw’s creation, the two drones had settled down and behaved very well, so the medics had allowed them to stay out with their brother. Unfortunately, they would only serve a little to her needs, and she ended up asking Ratchet if there was anything she could study to help with the “Allspark” powers issue without actually using her powers. It was an easy task, and she found herself scrolling through a datapad with her creations right by her side, trying to wrap her mind around it.