His Love [Fred Weasley x Reader]

54) Guilty not guilty

Warnings: funeral, mentions of deaths, mentions of nightmares, guilt, Lee being absolute sweetheart (I love him) and also him being a bad cook

Y/n's POV

Professor Dumbledore's occurred a week after the battle. Hundreds of chairs were placed around white tomb near the Black Lake. An entire delegation from Ministry has been staying in Hogwarts past week. Almost all students attended funeral, except for ones that were pulled out of school as soon as parents heard of headmaster's death.

All of the Hogsmead residents had come as well. Dumbledore's friends and people that respected him came to say their final goodbye. Even Beauxbatons' Headmistress, Madam Maxime, came here from France. Even centaurs and merepeople joined the funeral

Fred and George were helping Bill stand. Fleur whispered to him that it would be better if he stayed in bed. Bill reassured her with kiss that he would be fine. Hagrid carried Dumbledore's body wrapped in starry silk and placed it on tomb.

Professor's friend gave a good-bye speech. Half of the people cried. Merepeople sang their melody in honor of late Headmaster. Centaurs released arrows above our head, drawing gasps from most of us.

As funeral finished and people began to leave, I noticed trio walking by the lake. Their faces were serious as they spoke. I made me scared for them. They were up to some self-sacrificing shit again.

***

It's been a few days after Professor Dumbledore's funeral and the only thing I could think of was what I did to Rowle. I shouldn't have snapped like that. I killed someone in wave of anger and I can't shake away quilt. I don't regret it entirely, but I'm not proud of it. Regret haunting me in the night and I don't think it'll stop anytime soon.

It was like he found way to taunt me even from hell. For days after battle the only thing I dreamed of somehow always included Rowle. They varied but he was always on them. One dream was about him killing my dad. In the other one he killed my mum. In one he killed Fred.

Fred would wake up every time nightmares struck. He would hold me close to him. Kisses pressed on my hairline and forehead. Sweet nothings whispered in my ear every night. I haven't told any of the boys. I didn't know how they would react. I made up a lie that nightmares were because of the war. It wasn't a whole le after all.

Fred seemed to buy it. But his over-protectiveness always took over. George and Lee caught up that something might be wrong as well. Bags under my eyes were pretty much dead giveaway. They asked if everything was okay. Thankfully they didn't question anything further when I told them it's nothing to worry about.

"Okay spit it out. You're unusually quite ever since Professor Dumbledore's death. And you look like a fucking zombie. What's wrong?" Lee asked as he put a mug of warm tea in front of me and sat on armchair across the table. Fred and George left to help Molly and Fleur move Bill in Shell cottage, a house Bill and Fleur had just moved in.

"It's nothing. Just thinking." I answered, taking a sip of tea.

"Oh, don't 'it's nothing' me. I know you long enough to know something's off. What is it? You know, you can trust me with anything." Lee said, sincerely.

"I know, Lee."

"Then what's wrong?" He asked again. "Did you kill someone?" He joked but his eyes widened when he saw the look on my face and my bowed head.

"Oh, shit, you actually did. Oh Godric, I'm so sorry I was joking... I didn't know." Lee apologized and moved to sit on couch next to me. "A Death Eater?"