play - jenkai

11

When I was trying my hardest to not think about something, I always threw myself into work. I accepted new clients even when I knew my clientele was already full. I sometimes barged into Seulgi's office and took off some of her workload when I finished mine. I busied myself. It was what I always did and it always worked.

I mean, how does one go about life after clearly admitting to their ex-boyfriend that 'hey, so I didn't mean to break up with you I was just fucking terrified'.

I felt like these past few weeks were just a series of me fucking up over and over again, putting myself through hell. Ultimately, I realized trying to seem so unaffected was actually really exhausting.

Doyeon's voice interrupted my thoughts and I glanced up to find two bodies heading straight into my office.

"Sorry boss, I told her you weren't accepting any new clients but she kind of just pushed her way through." Doyeon nervously glanced at me and looked back at Jisoo. "Ma'am, if you call before hand I'm sure she could-"

"Doyeon it's fine." I interrupt. I don't take my eyes off of Jisoo and she doesn't take her eyes off me.

"You sure?"

"Yeah." I nod.

Doyeon takes hesitant steps but the door eventually clicks shut behind her. Meanwhile, Jisoo and I have yet to break our staring contest. If someone could be the embodiment of fury it would be Jisoo in this very second. Before I could question her sudden appearance, she cut me off.

"You are by far the most idiotic person I know." She snaps. "You walk around with this fake 'everything's okay' smile, trying to make everyone think you've moved on but-"

I let out a short sigh. "Didn't we have this conversation already?"

"I'm not finished." Jisoo huffs out an annoyed breath. She blinks slowly, rolls her shoulders as if she's trying to relax herself. "Deep down I knew all those smiles were fake. Every time you forced yourself to utter the words 'oh, I'm so happy for him, I wish him the best' was a load of bullshit but I told myself I wouldn't intervene until you had the guts to tell me why you did it yourself! But knowing what I know now I can't help but feel like an idiot myself."

I blink up at her in confusion. She glances at the empty chair in front of my desk and takes a seat.

"Of course I tried figuring out why you left him." Jisoo speaks softly, nodding to herself. "So many things went through my mind but the very obvious answer however did not. I should've known."

"It doesn't matter now." I say. "I told Jongin the same thing."

She shakes her head. "You don't understand."

"Understand what? He has Naeun now and they are perfect for each other."

"God, you're just as fucking clueless as him." Jisoo groans, throwing her head back. "How the hell do you expect him to simply move on from the fact that his first love broke up with him because she was terrified and not because she didn't love him anymore."

My eyes widened slightly. I begin to shake my head. "I didn't-"

"Do I think he had the right to know? Absolutely. Do I think it's shitty fucking timing? Another yes. Do I think your sudden confession might have complicated things? Triple yes."

"I don't want Jongin back." I'm quick to tell her.

"You don't?"

I shake my head again. "I would never try to get in between him and Naeun."

Jisoo's eyes flicker up to the ceiling. Her body shakes slightly until I realize she's actually laughing. She gets up to her feet, walks around my desk and pulls me up on my own. "You are such an idiot." She says once more before taking me into her arms.

My entire body freezes and I keep my hands to my hands to myself. I stare at the variety of pictures on the wall. I try to calm my nervous heart down by letting out a deep breath.

"Hug me back."

"This feels weird." I admit.

"It does." She nods. "But I missed you."

It was as if a heavy weight fell from my chest. With a great amount of uncertainty, I wrap my arms around her too. I blinked away the tears in my eyes and focused on the pictures on the wall again.

"I get a hug after you find out I broke your brother's heart because I was terrified of getting married?"

Jisoo rears back, staring at me for a few seconds. "You get a hug because as your best friend I should've known why you did it and I didn't. Instead, I wrote you off and ignored you."

"It was easier for everyone I guess." I shrug my shoulders.

"You have no idea how wrong you are about that."

-
This one is very short.

Also tired of Jisoo being the only sensible one here. Don't worry things will clear up soon.

M