Til Forever Falls Apart ∞︎︎ Loki

∞︎︎VI 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗋𝖾𝖾𝗄

The first thing I did upon waking up was look to my left. But he was gone. I sat up, and my eyes searched the cabin. So he'd finally had enough of me. He'd led me out into the middle of nowhere, only to abandon me. I should've known.

I stood, and didn't know what to do first. Cry or scream. I could throw things. Or I could let myself black out; that would work to ease my insanity for a couple minutes.

When I rounded the corner from the bedroom to the kitchen, I found breakfast. Freshly cooked eggs. I raised my eyebrow. He'd even set out a glass of milk for me.

I walked outside, and immediately crashed into his stone chest. I pulled away, and almost hugged him. So he hadn't left me after all.

I was much too paranoid to be living with the trickster god.

"Loki," I breathed a sigh of relief. "I thought-I thought you left me."

He made his way back to the kitchen, and motioned for me to sit down at the small dining table. "No, I only went to get some food from the nearest town. We're all stocked up now. There was already some food in the pantry, too."

I looked up at him. "That means this cabin belongs to someone. Loki, if they have food here, they'll be coming back soon."

He assured me that it was alright. Surprisingly, I didn't have much of an appetite. I wanted to get straight to work.

"Okay," I said happily, after eating two bites of eggs. "When do we start?"

Loki sighed, and led me outside. He sat in the grass against the cabin, and said, "Go for it."

"What do you want me to go for?" I asked.

"Do the thing. That's how you start."

I blinked at him. "Well, I can't do the thing unless I'm upset..."

He licked his lips. "Think about your scumbag of a boyfriend cheating on you, then."

Oh yeah. The memory made my head hurt. I wondered if Jake was sad at all about my escape. Did he care that I'd gone totally psycho and deuced out with a murderer? Or was he too caught up with his blonde bitch to even think twice about me?

I closed my eyes, and willed my body to do the thing. The one time I actually wanted it to happen.

I tried many times. Nothing.

Jake's stupid memory didn't seem to have enough of a hold on me. And, after a while, Loki began to grow irritated. I was wasting his time.

I closed my eyes again, and listened to the things around me. I listened as hard as I could, and found a bubbling creek. I smiled. It was so calm, and I could picture it in my mind. It must have been close by. I grabbed a hold of the creek in my mind, and heard the water flowing off the rocks, the hum of a dragonfly.

Then I saw something I did not want to see. Daddy. His face was suddenly in my head. His face when I'd pushed him down in the cell. His face when I'd looked over my shoulder as I sped down the S.H.I.E.L.D. hallway. His face as I drove away with his nemesis.

No, Jake didn't care about my escape, but I knew my father was close to insanity. Beating himself up about it. Wishing that he was a better father, wishing that I was a better daughter, too, and hadn't left him high and dry. Tears started to fall down my cheeks.

Loki said something, but I wasn't listening to him. My heartbeat became louder in my ears, and that all-too-familiar surge struck my body.

I couldn't see. I had no sense of direction. I knew I was darting around aimlessly, and I started to scream. My head hurt. I felt icy tears falling down my front, and then I felt Loki's arms grab me.