The Ends Of The Earth

chapter thirteen- he could tell

He could tell     

She woke up in a panic, another nightmare. Liza stood up from her makeshift bed on the floor and walked over to her dresser. She grabbed the first hoodie she found and pulled it over her head. She walked out of her room and went straight for the elevator.

She was met with the cold summer air. Liza was a little upset that she couldn't see the stars due to the pollution but being outside in the cold was enough to calm her down. She had learned recently that the cold is helping her with her panic attacks or the beginning of a panic attack. It brought her back down to reality.

Liza walked over to the edge of the building and sat down letting her feet dangle from the edge. She had the same dream again. She lost her powers and she couldn't heal anyone. The only way she was able to calm herself down was by giving herself an injury to heal or going outside to sit in the cold.

Liza was starting to get scars from her cuts. They were faint but they were still there. Her powers and the serum coursing through her veins were what was making her scars look several years old. It made her feel better knowing that if Bucky saw them he would thing hydra gave them to her and not herself.

She didn't want him to worry especially when he's going through the same thing. Nightmares, panic attacks, anxiety, ptsd. He had the same thing going on as Liza did. She didn't want him to be worried about her because he was healing from the same thing. He had his own things to worry about.

Of course if Bucky knew what she was going through he'd drop everything to help her. She knew that, she just didn't want him to. Liza wanted him to focus on himself before he ever thought about help her. She always put herself last.

Liza watched the run rise. It was a beautiful sight to see. The myriad shades of color coming over the large buildings. With a sigh she stood up from her spot on the edge of the roof. She pulled the sleeves of her hoodie over her cold pink tinted hands to warm them up. Her nose was rosy red from the cold wind.

She walked back into the elevator and went down to the kitchen. She was starving but didn't have enough energy to go downstairs to get something to eat just yet. "Good morning" Steve chirped. Of course he was a morning person.

"Morning" Liza mumbled and walked over to the fridge. "You okay? You look a little cold" Steve asked pointing out her red nose and cheeks. "Yeah I'm okay" she flashed him a small smile and grabbed a bottle of water. "You going to the training room?"

Liza nodded "yeah I need to burn some steam off" she then walked back into the elevators to go to her room. She changed quickly putting on a long sleeved shirt and a pair of short to go with it. She knew it was going to get hot with the long sleeved shirt but she needed to hide her new scars.

She pulled her hair up, grabbed her water bottle, and walked to the training room. She was happy to see it empty. It was pretty early and the only early riser at the compound was Steve and occasionally Bucky.

Liza wrapped her hands and went straight to the punching bag. She let herself get into a zone, the one she was commonly in when she was alone at hydra. She let herself think about her thoughts as much as she wanted not really focusing on her punches. However her punches were perfect, her form and everything because it was forced into her head. Perfection.

She didn't even need to think about her form or how to punch someone the proper way because she had everything memorized from her years of training. Liza fueled her punches with frustration, anger, sadness, everything she felt but never said.

The chains holding up the punching back began to grow weaker with every punch she took, until it finally broke free with her last punch. Her eyes widened when she saw the hole she had created in the wall from the bag.