Canadian Freakshow, take back what I made

New normal

It's been maybe a year since they'd gotten back to their usual lives. They'd all managed to get their original jobs back as well. Although they seemed to be much harder than they remembered. New Zealand had gotten back to watching over the flock of sheep. Sure it might be easier to chase foxes away when you can fly, but it's a little harder to see any foxes when you're side view is blocked by two colourful parrot wings. America of course was back to being a security guard, which again, was a little hard to do when you couldn't see behind you. Ever since he'd gotten back to a comfortable environment where he wasn't getting popcorn thrown in his eye, the feathers on his wings had finally managed to grow back properly. The only one who wasn't finding their job terribly difficult was Australia. But you'd expect that from someone who already works with dangerous animals. Although that's not to say he didn't find trouble elsewhere.

Another afternoon after a tiring days work, and America and kiwi were sitting at home, talking over their third or fourth bottle of cheap beer. All was somewhat peaceful until the front door was slammed open and then shut again in a matter of seconds. The only clue as to what was happening was Australia, leaning against the door, looking like he'd just confronted the devil with nothing but a fork. "Neighbours dog again?" America asked. "No! The cat! The fucking cat!" Said Australia. "Yea that thing almost got me yesterday too" Said Zealand. "Sit down before you burst a blood vessel" America said, signalling Australia over to the couch. "Why is it I can walk around A damn crocodile enclosure without getting looked at sideways but I get bullied by a fucking house cat!?" Australia said, walking over to the couch. "Cause wild animals are chill with other animals. And house cats are assholes" Said America. "You'd think a giant man eating reptile would be the bully huh" Said Zealand. "I swear if there was some kind of way to at least look normal again I'd be first in line" Said Australia. "Oi at least you get a cool defence mechanism" Said Zealand. "Bitch- you have the strength of ten men! Not to mention I'm the only flightless one!" Said Australia. "Aw what you jealous Mr. first in line?" Said America. "Shut up ame!" Said Australia.

"Just drink your beer, I didn't pay five bucks on it for you two to have a sober argument" Said Zealand. "Where'd you even get beer for five bucks!?" Said America. "Some sketchy dude in an alleyway..looked like a serial killer but I'm not dead yet so" Said Zealand. "Oh sweet, drugged beer!" Australia said, grabbing a bottle. The three of them just began slugging the beer down like it was the end of the world, considering it a reward for having to be chased down the street by some lesbian neighbours cat that somehow keeps escaping the house. And of course, within about twenty minutes of drinking, they were all blacked out. Usually you'd expect someone to just go full on insane while drinking but somehow they skipped that and went straight to the hour before a hangover. Zealand was laying face down on the floor, attempting to count all the threads in the carpet while America was doing the same with the couch. Even though the couch was made from leather. And as you would expect, Australia was sitting upside down staring straight up at the ceiling light. "youg..you guys ever noticed hows..the lights look like...liwhatsitcalled...a nipple?" Said Australia.

New Zealand rolled over on his back to look up at the light as well "holy fuck yous right youfff..ucking genius" He said. "WOULD You two shhhhhut up!?...mmtryna count here" Said America. "Count wwhhaatt? It's made of cows!" Said Australia. "Ha..cow couch.." NZ said, looking stoned. "Cow couch" Australia repeated, as the two of them were chanting 'Cow couch' An envelope had fallen in through the mail flap in the door. America glanced over at the envelope, examining it from a far. "Hey who's birthday is it?" He asked. "It'sss..probablytheneighboures apologising for the cat" Said Australia. "Oh yeahh..last time one of them made us banana bread" Said Zealand. "I miss that banana bread" Said Australia. "Aus go read it" Said America. "You go read it!" Said Australia. "I told you to read it-" "FINE I'LL READ IT!" Australia yelled, stumbling off the couch. He picked the envelope up, opening it and starring at the letter. "...I can't read" He said. "Yeah you can!" Said Zealand. "Oh yeah" Said Australia.