#smackmyasslikeadrum

smackmyass

AUTHORS NOTE: this is a joke making fun of how some people write they're story's so don't take this seriously
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hello
i know what you're thinking
"oh wow she's probably so basic"
well guess what...
i'm not like other girls...

my name is Smackmyass Likeadrum
i'm 3'9 and i weigh 1 pound. i have long blonde hair and big boo- i mean big eyes... big blue green brown orbs. I'm very insecure.
i get bullied and my life SUCKS

i walk down the stairs of my giant mansion only to be greeted by my mother (she's terrible)
"Hi sweetie, I made you your favorite...pancakes!" my mom says

"Shut the fuck up you ugly bitch" and i slap the pancakes out of her hands and walks to school.

I walk into a brick wall...
A big muscular wall...

i look up and see the hottest man in the world.
I blush "uh hi i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i'm Smackmyass..."

He looks at me with his blue green grey brown hazel icy cold warm orbs.

damn he's fine (excuse my language)

he looks at me and growls "stupid slut" he says walking off

i start crying and run to school.

when i get to school i see you won't believe it...that hot guy from earlier!!

he walks up to me "i'm kidnapping you."

OMG HES SO FINE

he grabs my wrists and throws me across the city all the way to his mansion.

he looks at me and growls "Im a mafia boss" he says.

OMG YESS DADDY!!

wait i know this hunk

that's Harry Styles JJ Draco Catnoir Edward Cullen Ace Big Dick!!!

the most feared mafia boss

"I'm not scared of you" i say looking up at him.

"you should be" he grabs my wrists and pins me against the wall.

things are about to get steamy...
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A/N
next chapter is seggs lol