Pursuit of the Whole

LV. Like a Horse

Dad bit his lower lips so hard, I thought it might burst, "He was smiling as she said: Welcome home, dad!" His jaw motions from side to side, and there was this feature on his face that seems so...painful. "And when I saw that, I cracked."

I don't blame him.

If I had seen that scene, I would've done more than crack.

"We suffered so much...and there he was...with his wife and daughter. Standing...breathing...laughing...living...happily."

I swallowed the uncomfortable lump in my neck. Now is not the time to get sucked into a miserable state. Does it taste bitter knowing your rapist lived a happy life with his family after the inhumane things he did to you? Let's say swallowing a handful of lemon was much more tolerable than this. At least that's temporary.

"Did you get help from anyone?" I ask. "Did anyone notice you did it?"

Dad was quiet for a moment; he was scrolling through his memories. "At that time, everyone pretty much looked at me the same way." Pity. "There's not much that I can remember."

"I see." I can imagine what dad remembers at that time - his lifeless daughter and the monsters who made her that way. For him to be observant during that type of situation would be surreal. "How about some normal breakfast?"

He smiles, "I'd like that."

When he got up, I gave him another hug.

"What's this for?"

"Just seems like you need a bit of love," I said.

Dad didn't respond; instead, he embraced me in return.

Afterward, we ate breakfast and pretended that the discussion from earlier didn't exist. It's always been like that. We don't avoid heavy topics, but we don't allow them to consume every part of our lives either. If we did, the fragile string in our family wouldn't have held.

After breakfast, we realized for a moment. An hour or two passed, and I decided it was the best time to reveal my trump card. Well, no time is ever the best time, but it do or done.

With the USB in my hand, I went downstairs.

"What's that?" Mom asks.

I stop twirling the USB and walk into the other side of the house with her. "Remember when I said I went to school to talk to a friend?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I asked her to dig up some dirt about Blood Moon." I hold the USB up.

Everyone's attention was on me.

"I didn't expect it to be this." I plugged it onto the TV and closed the blinds. Everyone gathers around the couches.

The video played.

Footstep echoes.

Crying.

Desperate plead for life.

Mom gasped, "Oh my. How could they do this?"

I unplugged the USB.

"Where did you get that?" Dad asks.

"A friend at school."

"You're going to use that in court?" Brenda asks.

"Maybe."

"You're going to make lots of enemies afterward," Eric commented.

"Guys! Guys!" Kai slides the backyard door open. "Look! Look! Roly-poly! Roly-poly!" Kai squatted down and gently rolled the roly-poly. He looks up and laughs.