Do I love you? (Ryatt)

Eight- Strawberry Lips

CHAPTER EIGHT:
Strawberry Lips.

In which Matt Watson & Ryan Magee finally make it home, but not without snacks of course.

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Matt was taken to their car in a wheelchair, nomatter his protest. Ryan snickered, as the nurse escorted them, pushing a rather unhappy looking Matt. As the nuse walked away, leaving the two boys alone, Ryan laughed "You look like a fucking wet cat!" He giggled as he helped Matt into the car. "Fuck you" Matt retorted, not being able to find a witty comeback, but his expression lightened a bit.

"Common ya love me." Ryan sang as he got in the driver's seat smiling. Matt pretended to pout, crossing his arms over his small chest.

As they drove, the tall boy's eyes wandered out the window. He explored the terrain with his mind, eventually spacing out completely lost in his own thoughts...

His mind was at war with his heart. Matt felt torn between his thoughts, his fears and his feelings. He came to realize more and more that his feelings for Ryan weren't some stupid crush, they were genuinely real. But on the other hand...

What would people think?

This thought occurred over and over again throughout his life. This thought seemed to lurk in the back of his mind. It made him feel small. It made him feel vulnerable.

He felt he had to put on this face, this beautiful illusion to distract from what he really felt. To fool the onlookers, to show them he was more than okay, he was doing great. He was just a puppet on a string, to please his audience in whatever way they deemed fit. To act like he was happy, that he felt okay. Burying the sadness and anxiety deep within him, only to take it out on himself later.

He felt so alone.

So hurt.

So broken inside.

But he could never let the world know of his internal turmoil. He decided he couldn't let anyone know about his feelings, especially those he harbored for his best friend. He couldn't. Not after what happened.

The memories flashed through his head...

Memories of his best friend from high school. Matt remembered telling him he had feelings for him. He remembered being called things he would rather not think about. He remembered word spreading, and becoming a punching bag for the people he thought he had known his whole life...

Matt shivered reliving those days, shoving them back into the scrapbook of sad memories that he called his heart.

"Matt...?"

He heard a voice.

"Earth to Matt."

Matt snapped out of his daze, shaking his head just as a dog shakes off water.

"fuck, sorry." Matt smiled, looking over at Ryan.

"You're good man, what'd you want from seven eleven?" He smirked in amusement at Matt's confusion.

Matt blinked, "chips." Matt stated confidently. "Anything else?" Ryan raised a dark eyebrow in ask. Matt's pale face lit up in excitement as a particular thought crossed his mind... "slushie!" Matt beamed. The brown-eyed boy chuckled, "what flavor?" Matt raised his index finger to his lips, tapping them absent-mindedly.

"Surprise me." Matt winked as Ryan got out of the car, cheeks slightly flushed.

Ryan's black slides slapped against the pavement as he approached the automatic doors of the convenience store. He entered, making a B-line to the slushie machine. He picked up two large cups, holding one in each hand as he decided. He looked at the row of flavors before him, feeling giddy with excitement.

He giggled, at his own cleverness as he filled Matt's cup with strawberry and cherry. While he filled his own with blue-raspberry and lime. He snatched up a bag of chips, paid at the register, and walked back to the car, where Matt eagerly awaited his arrival.

He handed Matt the icy beverage, with the lid slightly askew so he could see the color. He looked at both slushies, piecing it together in his head and giggled. They both smiled at each other as they sipped their signature colored drinks.

Ryan, Still with the cup in his grip turned the wheel of the black SUV expertly, maneuvering around the surprisingly small parking lot of the Seven eleven. He flipped on the blinker with his index finger lazily as he waited for an in on the main road.

The blinker made a quiet ticking that could be heard throughout the car. It sounded somewhat like a clock, counting each second in the passage of time. He felt some sort of existential dread climbing up from within him...

It made Matt realize that time progresses so quickly, It made him think of the opportunities that he had lost and those that he had gained over his short life. He looked out the window once more, enveloped in thoughts as Ryan listened to the radio, humming along in a rich baritone. Matt looked at him, his gaze softening.

Out of all the people in the world, how ever did I manage to get you?

Matt thought, a small smile crept onto his face, drawing the blush from his pale features.

"Whatcha lookin' at?" Ryan asked playfully, catching Matt's stare.

"You-" Matt whispered softly, almost as if he were consoling himself of the fact.

Matt cleared his throat in the hope Ryan hadn't heard his slip up. Matt laughed, responding in his casual, nonchalant manner, shrugging a bit. "Fell asleep with my eyes open dude." He chuckled. Ryan smirked at him, replying with a snide remark. "You can't even sleep like a normal person." He grinned, continuing to hum along with the radio. Matt rolled his eyes, sitting back in the dark leather seat.

The car pulls into a familiar driveway in front of a familiar house. "We should get you to bed." Ryan parks, pulling the keys from the ignition. Matt groans, opening the passenger side door. Ryan takes the thin boy's dainty hand in his own as he helps Matt out of the SUV. The dark-haired boy guided his friend up the stairs, reaching the door to their shared apartment. The light-haired boy stumbled a bit, feeling weak for a number of reasons. Ryan guided him to his room, still hand in hand as they reached their destination.

Ryan covered Matt with the blankets strewn about his bed, making sure he was comfortable. Ryan smiled, seeing the blue-eyed boy's blonde lashes flutter closed. He looked foundly at Matt lying there...
So peaceful...

He studied the freckled boy's face, noticing his cold lips were tinted pink from the slushie. Ryan brought his hands to his cheeks as they burned red with bush.

God... He's beautiful...

Ryan continued to stare, wondering what he might taste like...

The brown-eyed boy leaned down, carefully brushing a mousey-brown strand of hair from the sleeping boy's delicate face.

Ryan's dark lashes close as he leaned forward, pressing his lips against Matts.

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A/N

Just moved into my dorm at college...
It's my first year and I'm already swamped.
But it's okay!
Film school!!! Yaaaaaa!

Anyways, just wanted to say a big thank you to FrostyTips for all the support! ^v^

Thank you thank you thank you!!!

~ Rainy