Claustrophobia (Boy x Boy) ✔

8) MY LITTLE ROUTINE

*Ian Romero's POV

Although I tried to tell myself Cody wasn't my problem, every time I saw his beaten up face, I felt a bang of guilt in my gut.

First of all, only a couple of days ago I had thought I wanted to punch him in the face. Probably during the same time someone was actually doing just that and he had clearly wanted to hurt Cody a lot more than I did. I mean, he could be annoying, but he didn't deserve that. No one did.

The more I looked at Cody, the more I started to wonder something I really didn't want to believe. It was something I didn't even want to think about, because if it was true, then that would truly make me an asshole. If it was true, I don't know what I would do with the guilt. But it was also possible I was making too hasty conclusions, and that was what I chose to believe.

That was what I needed to believe.

"So, tell me again, why are we here? If I remember correctly, it was only yesterday when you harangued how much you hate that guy and now you want to watch over him?" Ade asked, taking a more comfortable position and dug another chip from the bag he was holding.

"I'm not watching over him, I just like it here." I muttered, looking anywhere but at him.

"Yeah, sure.." Ade smiled shortly and raised his eyebrows.

"Fine, maybe I'm a little, but that doesn't mean I like him any more than I did yesterday." I admitted.

I was there for a reason and that reason was to see, if Cody really was stupid enough to go to the practice in the condition he was in. Turned out he was.

Cody looked pale and giddy even before he started running and he was out of breath before he made it out of the track. I wasn't sure what kind of run they had planned for the day, but I prayed Oat wouldn't leave Cody out of her - no, their - sight.

Ade didn't seem too bothered about anything, when he just continued munching his chips and writing an essay. I should have been writing mine too, but there I was worrying about a guy I didn't even like.

After half an hour or so Oat ran back to the track. They were sweating, when they went to get their water bottle. At first Oat didn't look worried, but after another fifteen minutes had passed, they started to look around. Then they run from the track, back to where they had come from.

I'm pretty sure by then I was biting my nails out of nervous anticipation and stress. My mind could create about a hundred scenarios about what could have gone wrong, which was certainly not helping.

It felt like forever until Oat finally came back with a very ashen and weary looking Cody. They were talking about something and they weren't running. I felt relieved watching them, knowing that at least he hadn't managed to kill himself.

The rest of the week I kept doing the same and I dragged Ade with me. At first he didn't seem to mind too much, but by Friday he was already fed up with the routine. The next week he made me go alone.

Believe me, I had no idea why I felt compelled to be there. Frankly it was even making me frustrated with myself, because I did not like the guy. I did not care about Cody and he definitely wasn't my problem.

Cody was slowly getting better: the black eye and the bruises on his face had faded away almost completely, the cuts seemed to be healing well and he didn't have to move his body as carefully. He no longer got out of breath as easily and the physical exertion didn't seem to make him giddy or weary anymore.

But by the looks Cody gave me.. Well, I could tell he wasn't pleased with me looking after him. Whenever he saw me by the stands, he rolled his eyes and sighed exaggeratedly, as if saying: not you again.

Apart from my little routine, I kept my distance with Cody. We didn't talk, actually we hadn't said a word to each other ever since that one Tuesday morning. I tried not to stare at him too much either, since I didn't want to give any wrong impressions. I didn't want anyone to misconstrue my curiosity as care or - even worse - like I liked Cody.

I think the reason I was keeping an eye on him was that I needed proof. I had to make sure my doubts weren't true, and so far it seemed that way.

Surely Cody acted like two different people when he was in the classroom and when he was at the practice.

In the classroom Cody never smiled and it was like he tried to shrink as small and imperceptible as he could. At the practices he was more like the Cody I used to know: he smiled (not often, but still) and he seemed more relaxed.

In the classroom no one talked to him and he always sat alone, outside the classroom he had Oat and at the practices he had conversations with others as well.

That difference was alarming, I'm not going to lie. But otherwise I couldn't find anything aggravating. I had had my doubts about Bryce, Jeremy and Kaleb, but lately they had behaved exemplarily. They no longer made jokes about Cody and they left him alone.

To me it was starting to seem like that even if there had been something going on, it had already ended. Well, until something about Cody's behaviour gave away a different message.

♡♡♡

Question of the day:
Sports or art?

(Me: Maybe art..? I mean I love writing, painting, drawing, photographing etc. It's something that's always been a big part of my life. But I also love sports, especially running.)