''Ian Romero, the person I hate the most in the whole wide world. He turned the entire school against me, and then just left me alone in the hell he created.''
There's no one Cody Walker hates more than Ian Romero, who is the reason he has been bull...
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*Ian Romero's POV
I felt like it was a lifetime ago, when Cody fainted at the kitchen table and I carried him in bed. I was pretty much in panic at that point. I had to search through the bathroom and the kitchen rather frantically, before I found a thermometer. By then I was distraught, and when I saw the number on the display, I was pacing around the kitchen and pulling my hair.
I called mom first, asking what I should do next. She told me to get medicines and try to lower the fever at home. There was no reason to panic, according to her, and I didn't need to take Cody to hospital. After the call I felt more at ease and fortunately I found the medicine from the cupboard as well. I gave it to Cody and I found a towel I could drench with cold water. I placed it on his forehead, hoping that would help to lower the fever.
I started to think there really was no reason to panic, until I realised I had forgotten something that could make the situation a lot more alarming. I needed to make another call, this time to Cole. And so the 15-year-old boy had to reassure me Cody probably wasn't dying of internal bleeding or organ failure. He wanted me to keep an eye on Cody, though, and to keep him up to date.
Cody was mumbling, barely making any sense. He was lost in delirious dreams, his mind pulled somewhere faraway. Even though Cody talked gibberish, I could make out a name: Kaleb. He was dreaming of Kaleb, and just like that the old feeling was back. The same twisting inside my chest and the intense fear of losing him.
Jealousy.
I wasn't jealous of Cody dreaming about Kaleb, because I knew whatever feelings Cody had for him were long gone. I knew there was no way Kaleb would ever be a threat to me.. again. Instead it was an echo of an old feeling that was trying to resurface.
How did I not realise it was jealousy? How did I not realise he was never really just a friend to me? Or that it wasn't the dream that awoke those feelings in me, but that they had always been there, hidden deep down?
I was so deep in denial, especially after I found out about dad's affair, that I didn't realise how jealous it made me when Cody told me he liked Kaleb. I didn't realise it was jealousy, just as much as panic, that drove me to make that stupid joke and shove Cody.
Somehow realising that made my guilt grow even bigger. Sure, I didn't realise what was actually going on in my head, but who does something like that to someone they like just after hearing that person has feelings for someone else? Isn't that, in a way, even worse than just being a plain old coward?
I barely slept that night. I just held Cody, feeling sick of worry and guilt. His body was soaked with sweat, but that didn't stop me from hugging him tight. Especially when that seemed to relax him and to make the fever a little easier to bear.
Then, just when I was about to fall asleep, Cody started crying, still deep in his fever dreams. Somehow I knew he was pulled back to where this all began: his crush for Kaleb, me betraying his trust and everything he had to go through after that. I tried to tell him it was okay and that he was safe with me, but what I really wanted to say was that I was sorry. Even if Cody was able to forgive me, I wasn't sure if I could ever do the same.
