My promise to him

Chapter 3

My mum and Frank are sharing a room on the third floor, along with me in my own room next to them. As much as I know Zack is with his family on the sixth floor. Not as much space as I would have liked, but at the very least it's not next to each other. 

Later on, when we've unpacked everything, everyone is lounging in the lobby chatting. Zack is on the other side of the room as well as Frank thank god. 

"Hey, Emma will do that," I hear my mum say and that suddenly snaps me back to reality. "Do what?" I ask. "I said you would go pick up the fish and chips" I give mum one of those, why the hell would you do that kind of looks though she does not notice. "Mum I don't know the way and I have no signal out here and it is pretty dark" I try. 

Unfortunately, Shawn hears, "Zack can go with her, can't you Zack" says Shawn pushing his sons shoulder to get his attention. Zack looks up at me and before either of us know it we are outside alone in the dark air. I give Zack a hard look "It's not like I asked to come," he says defensively though it's true.

I begin to walk down the deserted path, "Let's just go," I say. We walk in silence for a while. The air is cold enough to breathe smoke when you speak. I can't help shivering and I wrap my arms around myself. Why did I choose to wear my lace top and light jacket? Zack sighs, "have this," he offers me his hoodie. "I'm fine," I shudder. "Just take it, I have a jacket anyway." As much as I want to refuse, I'm so cold that I take it and throw it over the top. It's so big that I can wrap it round myself twice and I have to roll the sleeves up lots but the familiar smell of him has some sort of comfort to it and it immediately makes me warmer and I pull rest of the sleeves over my hands. 

"Thanks," I murmur. "Sorry what was that I can't hear you?" Zack jokes and I push him back as he laughs.

We continue to walk in silence until much to my resentment, he says, "Frank seems nice." Ugh back to this again, I think. 

"He's not but thanks," I say eager to get away from this topic. "Okay," he says awkwardly, "So what's your dad doing then, I bet he's out watching the football game live again like he always used too," he laughs. Oh god, this is awkward I say inside my head. 

A memory of dad shouting at the TV in the lounge at the football and shouting "GOAL!" every time they scored and swinging me up into the air floods my mind. Before it went wrong so fast. I quickly wipe the tears from falling down my face, hopefully the darkness hides it. 

"You know just because you are being forced to walk with me, doesn't mean we have to talk," I say back. He doesn't answer, and I know he doesn't really deserve that but otherwise I will cry, and I can't cry, not here, not now.

I take a deep breath and push of the aching hurt arising in my voice. "Sorry, it's just, he...err died" I gulp back a sob before it can take over and take a deep breath regaining to my normal composure, "He died 2 years ago." There's silence and Zack stops, "I'm so sorry...I, I didn't know..." 

For a brief second, I just want to throw my arms around him and cry into his shoulder, but that second is soon gone, and I shrug of the sadness. "I don't talk about it," I quickly brush off, "Anyway do you know where we are going?" I start walking again and he follows unsure of what to do, luckily, he drops it, "yeah and I think there's a short cut up here," he says, but his voice is softer as he speaks.

He turns down a path and I can just about make out the outline of a field ahead. I stick close to him as to not lose him. We get to a metal fence, "If we jump over here, we should be able to cut across the field which should save us time, so you can get back to texting your boyfriend," he says suddenly harshly, shaking the fence to test it. 

"Again, why is that any of your business?" I ask him, why is he bringing up my personal life again? He doesn't answer instead saying, "So you agree with me that he's snobby?" "What the hell, when did I say that?" I say as my sadness dissolves into anger. 

He smiles like he's glad to get on my nerves. I prefer it to the deep conversations though, I'm used to this side of him. 

He laughs to himself and I watch as jumps the fence easily with one arm. "What are you doing?" I ask looking back around suddenly feeling quite alone surrounded by the cold black air. It's much darker around here without the headlights of the passing cars and street lights of the main roads. Suddenly, I'm glad I didn't come alone.

"We're not in the city anymore remember? Come on princess," he says up against the fence, "this way is much quicker." I'm shocked, I can't do that. He can't leave me here all alone, can he? So instead I say, "I can't I'm wearing wedges, you can't climb a fence in wedges!" 

He sighs standing back up on the other side of the fence holding out his arm, smirking. "I'll help you, take my arm." I grab his arm for stability and slowly I put one leg across the fence. "Trust me," he says, and I relax a little as he guides his other hand around my waist pulling me over. 

I fall into his arms, in which he catches me easily and holds me until I'm back on my feet. My heart pumps hard in my chest as I look up in his eyes, they match the night sky with this sort of mystical blue that I've never noticed before. There's this moment of silence as I look at him and he looks at me, I get this sudden urge to kiss him- wait, what's wrong with me?

I push his hands of off me, "I can stand up you know," I say starting to walk on as I try to push what just happened from my head. "What in those wedges, no way!?!" he laughs jogging to catch up with me as we start to cut across the field. 

We talk for a while as we walk. Laughing a lot. When we reach halfway I stop him, "Zack?" I ask. He looks at me, "What?" I know I'll probably kill myself later for saying this to him but it feels right, "I might have been a bit harsh on calling you out earlier, I've come to the conclusion that you're more so just really annoying." He stifles a slight grin and carries on walking.

 I follow. "Annoying... I'll take annoying, it's a step up from basically calling me a stalker. And, did I actually just hear some sort of apology come out of your mouth?" he responds, gasping dramatically. I shake my head and watch as his fringe falls in his eyes and I want to brush it back, feeling his milky brown hair through my fingers. God, what am I thinking?

He brushes it out of his eyes, "Shut up, I am capable of them you know," I say playfully knocking his arm, "Just not to me," he laughs and I feel some kind of connection with him, he carries on, "I guess some could say that I was too quick in thinking you were as of an irritating drama queen as you were when we were younger ." 

"Hey!" I say pushing him and frowning. "I said maybe i was wrong!" he defends quickly, putting his hands up in a surrendering position. I smirk at him, "i don't know whether to take that as a insult or a compliment," I respond. We carry on walking however, suddenly there is a shout. "That's the farmer, quick run," he says grabbing my hand. My hand tingles in his and I try to ignore the feeling. 

We laugh as he pulls me along after him and we sprint through the fields. The cold night air waves through my hair and I smile. I really miss this, I think briefly to myself. 

We get to the other side and he lifts me over the gate and we stop to catch our breath.