Captain.....

Warm

Hello,

It's been awhile. I started my last year of high school last week so it's been a little crazy but I have a little bit of free time so I'm gonna write more! Sorry for making you wait <3.

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Levi's POV

I watch as the brat was picking at his food. Thinking back I d we I idn't see him eat breakfast or lunch, making me 'tch'. "Oi brat". He flinched. "Yes c-captain?" Why does he stutter around me, "Aren't you gonna eat brat?" His eyes widened and he started to tremble, if I wasn't focusing on him I never would've noticed. "Captain, I'm not very hungry. I feel kind of sick still." The brat says. I don't believe it. How could anyone not see through such a white lie.

"Tsk, just eat a little bit brat. And it's your turn to do dishes again. That'll be your main job for awhile" I said. I can see the look in his eyes that he is getting overwhelmed, a part of me wants to comfort him but then another wants to push him to his limits. "Ok captain I'll do them now" he says quickly getting up before I can even say anything. Everyone has always gone to bed, it's 10. I sigh and mutter to myself "maybe I should've told him to do them in the morning" I pinch the bridge of my nose as I head upstairs to sleep, not like I can though.

⚠️TW⚠️ Slight Panic Attack

Eren's POV

I still have to shower. I need to cut. I have to do the dishes. I don't deserve to sleep. I don't deserve anything. My breathing picks up. I cant breathe. Help. It hurts. 'Nobody cares'. 'Cut yourself'. 'Jump off the building'. 'Drown'. "I-I can't" I grab my throat, it's dry I can't breathe. I collapse. Everything is blurry, the last thing I can see is... captain?!?? "C-captain" my voice dry and harsh.

Levi's POV

I hear a thud and decide to go check on the brat seeing as the noise came from the kitchen. I get my sword ready just in case it's an intruder. I see the brat? On the ground? He's shaking. "C-captain" i wince at how dry and harsh his voice sounds. He goes limp still trembling at the slightest. I knew I should've given him the night off, it was his first day here. Damn it. I pick him up and bring him to his room.

He is pretty strong for being young. No but actually, he won't let go. Right as I set him down he starts to whimper and shake again. I sigh what am I supposed to do. Whatever, I picked him up and laid him on my lap. At least I forgot my book here earlier.

Eren's POV

I wake up in a nightmare. Of course I did. It's the same one over and over again. I see my mother getting eating while I'm getting held back. I feel my face getting hot and I already know I'm crying, both in real life and in whatever this is. After I get to watch my mother die on repeat, I hear her telling me to kill myself. To die in the most painful way. How I was the worst mistake that happened to her. I was a mistake. No one ever wanted me. Why would anyone ever want me.

All of a sudden I'm awaken by getting shaken. Who would that be. I open my eyes, it's blurry. I rub them and feel the hot and sticky tears. So I was crying. Pathetic. "Oi brat you're crying" captain says. He almost sounds genuine. He wiped my tears, as he relaxes his hand I also relax into it. I feel more tears falling? It's warm. I calmed down.

Levi's POV

As I relax my hand on his face I feel him stop shaking and go into my hand. Cute. I start to rub my thumb against his cheek wiping away the tears from earlier, which didn't help because more start to spill out. I bring him closer, but I decide not to ask what the matter was because sometimes asking can make the situation worse. I've learned from... experience.

He fell asleep. I start to rub circles on his back, it seems to help him relax. Apparently I fall asleep because next thing I know it's morning. I sigh as I get up silently not to wake him. I'll let him sleep a little bit longer, that's probably the best sleep he's had in a long time. I need to keep an eye on him.

I walk down to the kitchen to make myself tea and catch up on some work. I check the time and it's around 5:15. The rest should be coming down any second. I'm pretty sure Petra is cooking today. I feel a shiver go down my spine, her cooking could probably kill you. But no one has ever said anything because she would probably kill us. It's only twice a month though.

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Eren's POV

I wake up and remember what happened last night causing me to shake. I see a glimpse of my piece of glass and gulp. He almost caught me last time. Shit. He saw me crying. Twice last night. 'You're a failure' 'nobody will ever like you' 'when will you realize nobody cares' I start to grip onto my hair for any source of pain that could bring me back before it's too late. I hear footsteps. It's too late. I look up. It's captain, he saw me in this state 3 times in a row. 'Pathetic'. I was snapped out of my thoughts when I feel something warm to down my forehead. Blood.

I lift my hands to see blood under my finger nails and tips. I see captain walking towards me, causing me to crawl backwards until I'm against the wall. He's still walking towards me. I'm so pathetic. He grabbed my hand making me flinch. "Eren" Levi said in a stern but soft voice catching my attention. "C-captain go a-away" he looked confused on why I said that. "Why would I do that" he sounded genuine 'he's lying' 'he pities you'. "I don't want y-you to see me like this" he hugged me. He. Hugged. Me. What?!

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    After about 20 minutes I calmed down neither of us talked. It was a comfortable silence until he started to get up. "Take a shower then come down to eat" captain said a little strained. I nodded and looked down at my hands, the blood was now dried and cracking as I moved my fingers. I sit there for a little longer before finally getting the motivation to stand up and try and walk it the shower. Oh yeah, I have my own shower. Captain told me it was because the others were far, but I know it's because everyone is scared of me. It's ok. Really it is.

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Alright that's the end of it. The end kind of got more self indulgent as it went on, sorry. I hope you enjoyed <3. Bye now