SOLE | ChanLix AU

CHAPTER 9 | Bygone

[A/N: There is a lot of point of views in this chapter. If there is no specific point of view stated on top of the paragraph, that pov would be Chan's. Please be mindful of when a pov opens and ends. It can cause a lot of confusion if you would be unaware.] 

All of us, except Wooyoung and Hyunjin, were relaxing by the pool. The others were swimming, some were at the bar and some were sitting in the shade. It was a nice cool day, the sun was hiding behind the clouds so it wasn't that hot.  Felix, Seungmin and I.N are playing cards games. They were all focused until I.N brings up a topic.

"Felix, I'm sorry to bring this up but I want to know what happened the night you left," I.N says a bit hesitant. Felix's smile fades away, he paused for a couple of minutes. Making the atmosphere between the four of us quite awkward. 

"I'll tell you guys what happened soon, I'll just get something from our room. Chan, can you help me?" He says while placing his cards on the table, I nodded at him and stood up as well. He was silent the whole trip up to the room. Once we got inside, he suddenly pulls me into a hug.

"Love, how much do you love me?" He asks, I was shocked at his question but still hugged him tighter.

"I love you more than myself, more than anything or anyone else," I tell him, he looks at me with worry in his eyes. Why is he acting this way?

"Is there something wrong Love?" I ask and he starts tearing up. I hush him to stop, I hate seeing him like this. 

"You should ask the others to come to our room, I want to tell you guys something." Are we really going to reveal what happened that night? Or maybe he wants to say something else?

Felix's Point Of View

[Gulf St. Vincent,  Adelaide | December 25, 2020 - Friday; 10:52 pm]

"You guys go ahead to the hotel, Me and Felix will go somewhere first," Chan said to the others. Hyunjin gives a look, he knew what was going to happen and the outcome of it. Once the others left, we head to the beach, it was a 25-minute drive from the city. Glenelg was a place we would go to relax. As much as I don't want to fill it with unwanted memories. What needs to be done should be done. There was no other way. Once we have arrived, we got out of the car and walked to the beach. He held my hand tightly, this might just be the last time I would hold his hand like this. If only I could do something to stop time and hold him like this forever I would do so. As soon as we reach the beach, he hugs me from behind. I couldn't stop the tears from falling at this point. I could not imagine not feeling his touch every morning I wake up beside him. 

"Love, our anniversary is only a few minutes away." He says making the pain more agonizing. I bite my lips trying not to break down any further. 

"Yes love, but I want to tell you something first," I say as clearly as a could even if the words seem to choke me up. I need to do this, it is for his own sake. He hums waiting for me to continue while he lay his head on my shoulder pulling me closer to his body. 

"Promise me no matter what I say, you will not look at my face. Just hold me like this until I say so." I tell him, he lifts his head off my should. I am sure he is wondering why I instructed him to do that. But I just can't bear to see his face once I tell him my decision. 

"What do you mean Love?" he asks tugging me so  I would face him. I fight back and still tried to face back from him.

"LOVE JUST LISTEN TO ME!" I say in a higher tone. I see him get startled from my peripheral vision. He then slowly embraces me from the back again. What should I do to the person I love. Can I really live another day without his presence with me, but more importantly can he live life knowing that life itself is giving up on me?